Testimonials for the Joy2MeU Journal

"I subscribed to your newsletter and lost access to it and am not sure how to access it again. . . .  I have read your book ( many times) and bought your tapes "The Dance of the Wounded Soul ". I cannot begin to tell you how much you have touched me in the search  for my own understanding of what's within me through your journal. Your search has become my search through your trials and triumphs. I have seen myself many various times at the crossroads in your journey and can relate on many of your rises and downfalls, and triumphs. To say I wished I had your in-depth foresight is not even near to any perception I have come to know or will know about God, Life and journey and the souls search.  You have helped to enlightened me through your life testimonies and insights about the wounded soul. But I've kind of lost touch with you in your journal because of my trying to get on with my life and understand how to continue the journey.  I find it baffling all this craziness in the world. I often wonder what its all about still. I try and take the one day at a time approach but I can't seem to shake the feelings of doom or gloom. I often wonder how you are doing and hope that you have found finally your true love and the family and that you've continue on with your work. Would appreciate if you could tell me how to get back on track with your updated journal. Better yet wish I could follow up on life and feel that I could make a difference like you have. Thanks so much for writting it down."

Recent feedback from Journal subscribers posted December 9, 2004

"Thank you for sharing in your recent Journal entry about your using boxes as dresser drawers. I was going to say that it is precisely that level of honesty that sets this Work apart, but that statement would not be true. I affirm every aspect of this Work is of a higher order of spiritual understanding than has ever been available to humanity before. But it is just this powerful insight into this condition of codependence that providing this detail reveals. As I was reading this, if it had been possible for words to crack me open to reveal the core of shame within that tells me I don't deserve anything better, this passage would have done it. I looked around this tiny house I have been living in for the past seven months with all of the boxes I have yet to unpack. My disease cleverly uses those metaphysical teachings about the outside being a reflection of one's inside to tell me how little progress I have made. Yet, I have made incredible progress. My progress is not about having a life that looks good (or reassuring) to others. It is entirely possible that on this Path, I may always have the equivalent of an untidy dresser drawer (or box). Robert, your Work has a way of rendering useless these weapons my disease would use against me. After reading this passage, I rose from my computer and did some grief work. Thank you, Robert, for once again showing me that it is not shameful to be human."

"i caught up on the last batch of newsletters and journal writing last night. I just wanted to write--i am so proud of you. really.  i totally noticed a difference in your writing by the time i got to the last journal entry--i felt your writing was lighter. as if you really had succeeded in shedding some of the weight that was in between you and receiving LOVE. and as always, the way you are so open to writing about it is so tender, and brave and honest and inspiring. all of those things. it was helpful to me. last night, reading your writing. i am so glad you are opening yourself up to even a greater balance between your writing and your real wants. and i am So grateful there is still so much writing in you because it continues to be Real and helpful to souls like me. I also really liked the bit about "Soulfish", first time i saw that. . . . . after reading your writing last night, i remembered once again to trust the flame in my heart, and be patient. i resonated especially with the part when you wrote you were ready to simply give up on seeing life as a struggle. amen. my heart is so tired of this weight. and to open up to receive. continued prosperity and abundance on your love-filled journey."

Recent feedback from Journal subscribers posted August 30, 2004

"Robert (!!!!!)
     I was looking for the passage in your Journal about--as I recalled it--burning brightly. Despite a nearly photographic memory (ah, the cosmic irony of bestowing the gift of eidetic recall on a classic codependent who has always wanted simply to forget), the necessity of scrolling through the Journal seemed to loom, and as I did so, I yearned for some enterprising soul to offer to annotate. However, once again, this afforded me the perfect opportunity to re-read "Dance 34" and the passage in which you refer to the "fear of shining too brightly." Once again, thank you for sharing this. I still do not understand the alchemy which allows an experience so personal to remain unbreached in its intimacy,  yet so universal to be capable of revealing me to myself. But thank you.
     But, the reason for the bouquet of parentheses involves something else I have not understood --until today. You have stressed the importance of affirming our Spiritual identity particularly when it feels least plausible or true. But, just as I am unable to understand the mathematics behind "string theory" and  must depend on the genius of others for the truth of the existence of many dimensions, so, Robert, I rely on your spiritual genius for the truth of our identity as Spiritual beings. My actual words to myself on this subject, when most in doubt, have been, "Robert burns so brightly. . ." and I feel like a creature of subterranean depths. I have to take his word for a sun within myself I never see.
     Today is a Very Special Day. One of my very favourite poems, and one I associate with you now, is the poem by E. E. Cummings with the line, "I who have died am alive today" about today being "the birthday of the sun." Well, Robert, today is the birthday of my awareness of the sun within me. It's hard to stop crying long enough to write. It is just such a wondrous, holy, sacred present. Our True Identity. Who it is Who is having this human experience. The Being of Light and Love. The only words I have for this are "shining brightly." Simultaneously, I felt like both some quantum explosion and some vast star going supernova had taken place in my chest. What I could understand was  "You are giving birth to suns. You are pregnant indeed (I heard this bubble of joy come out of my mouth) and the bringing of this to term is not your job." Our mission here, our purpose is greater than anything we can imagine. Everything I had within me would be brought forth. The plan involved great spans of time and vast reaches of experience. Finally, the depth of my conviction about my own failure in this lifetime was directly addressed. The worst act in my life was raised up before me; and what I understood was: "This is My Plan." It was part of the plan.
     So, it's all True. Who we are and what we are here for. The Light and the Love. The Magnificence.
And, fortunately for the rest of us, you, Robert, accepted the assignment to teach us how to love and accept ourselves in this lifetime. Because as my pitiable attempt to communicate a transcendent experience (that I wouldn't have missed, but wouldn't have hung around to experience except for you), amply attests, this experience of "shining brightly" requires a genius to describe. With deepest awe, humility, gratitude, and joy, I share with you what your courage to shine brightly allowed me to witness. Happy Birthday to all of the Magnificent Spiritual Beings who remember Who they are through your words and example. . . . . Robert, a postscript. The E. E. Cummings poem is entitled "Xaipe," a Greek word meaning "rejoice." How cool is that?"

Recent feedback from Journal subscribers posted July 27, 2004

"Hello, Robert!
     I read your latest journal entry at breakneck speed. I think you have perfected interactive journal-writing. I whooped and gasped and cackled and even jumped around the room a few times! You write without every really breaching the delicate intimacy you share with her. My whooping and gasping and cackling had more to do with the sheer reckless honesty you displayed. I do not know of another so-called "spiritual teacher" who would ever give expression to the feelings you did, if such expression called into question the efficacy of the the methods or the truth of the message.
     For some time now, I have been feeling, and expressing the feeling, that if I chanced to meet the Buddha on the road, or any other avatar, I would apply a baseball bat to their kneecaps. Just before reading your latest journal entry, I commanded my HP to appear before me so that I could beat him/her/it to a bloody pulp. "You come down and live this life and grow old and sick and poor and then die, all alone, and then you can tell me what a spiritual lesson that was for you." Somehow, your honesty gave me permission to see that even giving up this spiritual path as I knew it is still working a path.
     I have not the slightest idea where I am now. Or even who I am. And invoking the identity of the "Magnificent Spiritual Being full of Light and Love" feels hollow just for now. I have lost so much. I just want to go home. It is difficult to see the larger lesson in this or even to recognize the spiritual warrior learning lessons in the exhausted, emptied-out being I am right now.
     But. . .reading your journal entry, Robert, makes me wonder if many other people are going through the same intense emotional experiences. If there isn't, perhaps, some major spiritual transformation taking place on the earth at this time. Either I am dying or I am being born. A miracle either way, but either way, soooo painful. With gratitude, out here on the road to wherever this is, whoever this is,"

"By the way.......great journal stuff.......whew......brought back a lot of stuff in my last relationship only throw in drug addiction for good measure. Not mine of the other guys. Riding the that emotional roller coaster......I am so glad I chose to get off......I don't think I would have survived much more of it. Anyway, thanks for sharing I know how much it took to let go of her."

"WOW life is giving you the greatest and most difficult experience at the same time. I love hearing you in your writings.  Thanks again for your real life sharing it means so much to have someone share their honesty and reality as you know it in such a profound way."

"As I read your journal I could see your processing as the others but only this time you were at a higher level consciousness and could blast through the barriers more easily.......truly a spectacular event to watch unfold."

"Although I have not talked to you in a long time I read your journal and refer to your website often.  I am happy that people came forth to help you out for your last printing. This is the path that has guided,informed and been so much more to me, thank you a thousand times."

"Excellent Journal Article! It is so very kool to see your processing unfold.  It is like watching someone on a treasure hunt.....and when they find one of the treasures it is so exciting!!!!!"

"We, who read your articles, journal, etc. all benefit by it so much. What a wonderful way to work your plan and to help so many others at the same time. I know you do it for your recovery and growth, but the fact that you are willing to expose so much of yourself in order to let others see and understand the process that you have developed over the years is wonderful."

"Let me tell you the energy coming off from that first article is way past the bone.  I didn't even get to the second paragraph and I was heaving deep sobs of grief.  Robert it took me 3 hours to read that article all the while releasing this energy that was coming from ancient places." 

 "Wow.......I am exhausted feels like I went through it myself......It all makes perfect sense.  It is very kool to see the whole process from start to finish....very Amazing!

You can clearly pick out each step, how your codependence issues came through and how you reacted, how you processed those issues in a third person perspective, how you went through the grief process, the acceptance process, and how it brought you to a higher level......there was a lot more to it but you know what I mean.

You have a lot of information on processing but to actually see you work the steps...even though as painful as that was/is this is something that is very valuable....thank you. Here is an ENERGY HUG .......since I can't give it to you in person."

"Just finished reading your Journal - WOW.  Just because I can relate to your feelings does not mean I like them.  No pain, no gain?  Working with my therapist and you and me on that critical voice.  It takes time and effort and will and it seems to help."

"Until I found your web site, Robert, my experience with New Age teachings had been purely one of intellectual assent. I knew these things were true, I  desperately wanted to live these truths within my own life, but, wounded as I  was, I was like the character of Heidi, played by Shirley Temple in a movie,  wanting desperately to go back home, and never having the resources to do it.  Yours were the only teachings and the only methods which allowed me to rescue that abandoned little girl.

So, when I accessed the information about the Harmonic Concordance, I was struck by how much of the material only resonated for me on a heart level because of the healing I had experienced as a result of your teachings. Robert, I have never had any difficulty thinking of you as a Spiritual Genius, as a Mystic and as a Messenger of Truth. The unique difference with your Teaching is that is that it is Truth which I can immediately apply to effect change within my own life.  Your core teaching about healing our relationship with the whole of life, of Self with self resonated so strongly with me, that even as I read the material on these web sites about the Ascended Relationship and the Harmonic Concordance, I thought about the work of recovery establishing the harmonic concordance with the wounded parts of my self. Robert, you have prepared the ground for Something enormously significant to happen. . . . . Robert, I honor myself for the work I have done. I acknowledge that I walk my own perfectly unfolding path. But, my truth is that your work has prepared us for this Shift, for this Time of Ascension. This fills me with awe and gratitude."

"I laughed deep belly-laughs at your "don't try this at home" disclaimer about how raging at God does not always mean a check is forthcoming. Yes, my little magical thinker was tugging at my sleeve, so to speak, as I was reading your most recent journal entries. I drew closer to the screen at your passage about confusing milestones in your life with destinations. I am approaching one of my own: in a few days, it will have been one year since I first discovered your web site and embarked upon the path of recovery work. I have never spent a more conscious year. Having reached a milestone of sorts, by the calendar, the outcome I had been lusting for, the destination I had wanted to reach, was to feel so much better than this feels right now. Right now, I feel like I am falling apart. And, just at the moment when I feel that I must be doing this all wrong if I feel so sad, that maybe I should consider asking for telephone counseling, I start receiving these "flashes" that "Robert is going away." I thought, "Oh, come on, HP, it's obvious I don't know how to do this. Don't tell me this is the end." I mean, I am crying in parking lots when certain songs play on the radio. I am feeling inordinately huge disappointment when people who have been e-mailing me inexplicably stop. Recently, an e-mail on a spiritual subject prompted from me the most heartfelt expression of the pain I feel right now. It felt like all of the work I had done up to this point had been for naught, like all of the threads had been ripped away. His response was so gentle and obviously meant to build my self-esteem. But he only told me that I expressed myself eloquently, that I had such talent, that I had moved him deeply. . .and good luck with that spiritual breakthrough I am obviously having!

Really, what was I expecting him to say in an e-mail to a virtual stranger? The coup-de-Gras came when my mother wouldn't answer the door when I came to see  her. Tiny, tiny things trigger such supernovas of emotional pain in my universe. It might look pretty, but something, whole star systems, are dying here, folks! I cannot continue doing this work, I thought. I kept running into people who were not doing this work; and, they appeared to have managed the relationship thing quite nicely. They still had the friends they had made in grade school. A seventy-year-old woman told me this wonderful story of nursing her ninety-year-old mother after her recent stroke and surprising her with pumpkin pie for breakfast. That one did me in. 

And, then, Robert, I opened your latest journal entries. Once again, your honesty and your willingness to share your process demystified my process. While reading, it struck me that my pain is coming from very wounded children within me who are too young to understand. I might have learned to read at age 3, but I didn't understand human motivation when I was little. So, all of the intellectual concepts in the world are not going to heal these wounds. I am going to have to feel them to heal them. And my Higher Power is perfectly capable of providing me with whatever I need to continue on this path. 

So, I feel the need to say, Thank you, Robert, and Good-bye. Not in the sense of "I quit, and, I am never visiting this web site again." More in the sense of honoring what has passed and is now passing to make way for what is to be. I had the image, initially, of waving you across the night sky and of the world going dark after you had streaked out of sight. I thought I might stumble in darkness after that. But, I haven't spent a year with your web site, your book, your tapes, and your e-mail's for nothing. I have my own light. Infuriatingly, exasperatingly so, turning on my light is inextricably bound to feeling my pain. Doesn't Ralph Blum interpret the rune, Nauthiz, as Pain and Constraint, but also as the teacher? Can't tell you how many times I have drawn that rune. Now, I know why. Forgive the length. I respect your boundaries. I just wanted a little sacred time and space to observe this holy instant of change in all of our lives. Happy Birthday and Joyous Beginnings."

"Robert--when i read about your recent experience with romance, the wings of my heart just flew! Wahoo. i am so happy for you, for this experience how ever fleeting or longlasting it turns out to be. i especially loved the line about laughter and loving. gosh i wonder how you got to share that bicoastally. it sounds special. what an abundant summer for you!

you know, i see in your writing, your coming closer to openly just expressing the simple desire of living a simple loving life with a woman. I think its a sign that this is sure to manifest. it seems such a warm and positive desire.  but you're right. more will be revealed.

you are remarkable. i wish the words had flowed out of me the same way as they have on your latest testimonials:

"Your message has forever changed  my path in this lifetime.  Thank you so much for sharing your perceptions  and experiences through your  book, and your website. You are a guide and a healer, I will be forever grateful for having connected and crossed paths  with you and your work."

Its true. i am forever grateful. i'm scared but ready to learn more. i think its time to come forward more in the light. anyway, i hope i have expressed some of my gratitude, particularly in my earlier emails. . . .  there was so much in this last journal that....was a culmination. so much so it almost felt like good bye. you are intensely special, and transformational. how could a messenger like you not have a lonely path--in the world we have today." 

"Dear Robert:  I just spent five hours racing breathlessly from page to page of your Journal. If this were all that we had of your work, we would have to create a new genre of writing. While the excerpts from Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls, for me a 126-page 21st century epic poem of the Journey of the Spiritual Warrior, provide the Cosmic Perspective and a conceptual framework, theory, if you will, each Dance of the Journal offers the view from the human side, the practice. The entries read like the best mysteries, the finest detective stories, the most absorbing Heroic Myths. In some places, howlingly funny, in others, sacral-chakra-burstingly erotic, each Dance of the Journal makes the reader laugh and cry in recognition of both their wounded souls and their Magnificent Spiritual being-ness. The writer writes for himself, but the reader reads for herself / himself. The true gift of sharing this personal process with us is that we stop feeling this is too intimate, too personal. These are unapologetically human; as we read, we stop feeling we need to apologize for having a human experience. At the end of many hours of reading, we do not come away feeling we know the writer too well. The only Self of which we have any knowledge is our very own. Thank you, Robert." 

"To any Spirit who resonates with Robert's wisdom and belief system it is a Must to order his journal.  Robert gives so much revelation to many of life's mysteries from a human perspective that is understandable in 3 dimensions.  When I first found Robert's website I read four months straight everything he had.  There wasn't anything I found in his writing that I disagreed with.  He opened my eyes to the answers that I have been begging and pleading for all of my life.  Then I found he had an online journal in which I definitely felt compelled to order and I must say that it is the best $33.00 I have ever spent.  Anyone with an open mind will surely find this section of his writing fascinating and truly mystical!!!  Thank You Robert for meeting me back in this Life Time!" 

"I am a recent subscriber to your journal. I saw the link many times when I was in your website. My "critical parent" voice was right there to remind me of all the reasons I should not join. "You don't have the money (that one was the loudest...DUH!!!) "What possible benefit could there be to reading about someone else's journey???"..."go to the library and get a few self-help books"....You get the picture right :-)  I told that voice to hush up and I signed up for your journal. What a blessing, what a perfect part of my path. As I read; I feel, I laugh, I cry. Thank you for sharing your journey. I am reminded I am "not alone"." 

"Another thing that has helped me a great deal Robert is your Joy2MeU journal.  By reading this and seeing how you apply your process to common daily experiences it very helpful.  There is so much good information in that Journal.  It is truly another great tool for this business. Thanks so much."

"Thank you for responding so quickly, and setting up the journal availability.  I have to admit, reading your journal can be hazardous to my sleep time, it is nearing eleven and my alarm goes off shortly after 5 am.  I logged on a little bit after nine"