"On the other side of powerlessness is all the power in the Universe. On the other side of powerlessness is freedom, happiness, and peace within. On the other side of powerlessness is Joy and Love!
The answer is to stop fighting it, to surrender to the Spiritual Forces at work. Surrender to the possibility that maybe, just maybe, you do deserve to be happy and Loved."
"In the first step we recognize that what we have been doing is not working - the second step tells us that there is another way to do things. The third step is about taking the risk of trying that new way."
"The only way that I was able to make significant progress in the process of stopping self-judgment and getting rid of the toxic shame was to become conscious of the larger perspective. When I started to believe that maybe a Higher Power, a Universal Force, existed which was Truly All-Powerful and Unconditionally Loving then life started to become a lot easier and more enjoyable. Then I could start to see that the "accidents" and "coincidences" are really miracles. That the "mistakes" are really opportunities for growth."
to a page of
The Web Site of Spiritual Teacher, codependence counselor, grief therapist, author, Robert Burney and Joy to You & Me Enterprises
Go to Home Page
Robert is the author of the Joyously inspirational book
The Dance of Wounded Souls
|This page includes quotes from Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls and some excerpts from an article I wrote for the the Joy2MeU
The Twelve Steps
"The Twelve Step program of AA provides a practical program for accessing Spiritual power in dealing with day-to-day human life. A formula for integrating the Spiritual into the physical. Even though some of the steps, as originally written, contain shaming and abusive wording, the Twelve Step process and the ancient Spiritual principles underlining it are invaluable tools in helping the individual being start down, and stay on, a path aligned with Truth.
The first step is about recognizing that I am powerless to control life and other people and that the delusion that I "should" be in control has caused me a lot of pain and suffering.
"We are powerless out of human ego-self to get out of this quagmire. That is the bad news. It is also the good news.
The second step says while I am not in control of this life process there is a Higher Power, a Force, that is - and that Force is on my side.
Is it any wonder that I didn't want to surrender to God as I understood 'him.'
I could however relate to "The Force is with you." That resonated in my being. So I started to try to find a concept of a Higher Power that could possibly love me and be on my side.
"I had to start trying to find a concept of a Higher Power who could Love me even though I was an imperfect human. If my Creator is judging me then who am I not to judge myself? On the other hand if the Goddess Loves me unconditionally then who am I not to Love myself? And if the God / Goddess / Great Spirit / Universal Force Truly Loves me then everything has to be happening for reasons that are ultimately Loving.The third step says that if we surrender thinking we have to be in control and open up to receiving guidance from a Higher Power we will get help and guidance.
To see four different versions of the 12 steps from different sources go to 12 Steps - you can just collapse the browser window to return to this page. (My favorite is the Twelve Steps for Kids.)
The first is intellectual - when we first realize that there is something that's not working and that maybe we have to change, to learn a different way.
The second comes after we have intellectually learned what boundaries and healthy behavior are but we cannot stop acting out the old patterns in our closest relationships - we watch ourselves saying things we don't want to say, and doing things we don't want to do.
This is when it is necessary to do the emotional healing.
Here is my version of the initial steps from these two different levels.
Step 1. I acknowledge and accept that I am powerless out of ego-self to control my human life experience, and that the delusion that I should be in control has caused pain and suffering in my life.
This page contains some excerpts from a series
of articles about the Twelve Step process that Robert is writing for the Joy2MeU Journal.