Joy to You & Me and
Joy2MeU Update
| Hello Magnificent
Spiritual Being,
It is 3:06 am on August 13th as I sit here trying to figure what I want
to say here so that I can get this posted and announcements sent out today.
The last couple of nights I wrote the Newsletter portion of this Update
below - focused on explaining "What is an Intensive Training Day?" - and
have been sitting here for awhile this morning trying to figure out what
I am going to share in this first portion of this August 2006 Update.
I wanted to make early mention about the Intensive
next weekend in San Francisco; the one in September in Las Vegas;
and the successful one in July in Los Angeles; - but also wanted to give
you all a quick update on what is happening on the personal front for me
- without getting into one of my really long writing binges. And
I just realized that something I had written about an hour ago held the
clue for me to not only what I want to mention here - but also of a shift
in the focus of my recovery, my work, and my life that was just revealed
to me in the writing I did over the last couple of days. It is something
that I have been getting messages about - mainly from my life partner and
Marketing Director Susan - but I just now became conscious of a blatant
message concerning this shift that the Universe recently sent me.
This is a real "duh" kind of moment because the message is so blatant -
a "light bulb going on" / "aha" / "oh I get it" feeling that I get when
I get conscious of an intuitive message. What I started out writing
about earlier this morning is the weather - here it is:
"Has it been hot where you are this summer? It has been really
hot here! One of the reasons that I liked living on the coast
in Cambria so much was that it never got too hot, or too cold. After
growing up in Nebraska where the summers were very hot, and the winters
very cold, I really appreciated the more temperate climate of the Central
Coast of California.
We moved inland 30 miles to Paso Robles at the end of last December
because of a combination of not being able to find a large enough house
to rent at an affordable price in Cambria, and what seemed like a good
investment deal in a rent to own option the Universe had manifested for
us here in the inland wine country. At the time of moving here, I
knew that it got really hot here in the summer - and warned Susan about
that - but the way the Divine Plan was being revealed to us, it was obvious
we were supposed to move here.
Well it got really, really hot for awhile here. Up to 116 on several
days. And it still is getting into the 90s. We were more than
ready to move out of here during the really hot days, as things were quite
miserable - especially with the air conditioning not working in my car.
That combined with the reality of the real estate market taking a downturn
that made the investment opportunity much less promising, and a change
in our need for a large house because our family (which in December was
5 looking like it might become 6 if my son came to live with us) is now
down to 3 - made living here much less of a desirable situation."
Believe it or not, the key in what I wrote has
to do with the car. I just got a newer car - with air conditioning
of course. So now Susan and Darien - my precious step grandson /
God son who just reached 21 months - and I can travel in much more comfort.
I mentioned in my June update that Susan and I had been acting as primary
caretakers for Darien most of the time - and that has now evolved into
being the full time guardians and virtual parent figures to this amazing
little man. Thus our family size is down to 3 now - and a lot of
the energy in our lives is devoted to taking care of him.
Part of the perfection of the realization I just
had about the importance of the new car - is that in my October Update
for last fall I talked about some of the amazing miracles that have marked
my recovery in the same Newsletter in which I talk about the history of
my relationship with Susan, and the family she brought into my life in
2005. I was prompted to talk about those miracles partly by the fact
that at that time I was working on accepting the possibility of moving
out of Cambria and needed to talk about how important it had been to me
- and partly to reinforce my faith in my Path by reminding myself of some
of the incredible miracles that have manifested to help me through seemingly
hopeless situations along the way. The story of those miracles included
talking about my experience of doing positive affirmations and practicing
faith in relationship to the symbolic importance and role that cars have
played in my Spiritual growth process. (Which I just remembered includes
the role my car played in me entering codependency recovery - something
I talked about in my June
Update.) If you want to know more about my relationship with
Susan, with Cambria, with cars, and with the miracles of my Spiritual Path
and recovery journey, you can read that October
2005 Update (one of my long writing binges.;-)
In that Update, I talk about how the thing that
made this relationship possible was that I knew from the beginning I need
to surrender to the Universe's plan. That I needed to keep following
where the Spirit led me, and letting go of trying to figure out where my
journey was headed. Well, the car that I had for the past couple
of years was a Dodge Spirit. The new car that we just got - thanks
to finding a deal with no down payment and high monthly payments for many
years - is a 2005 Ford Focus that had been a rental car.
The realization that I had about an hour ago,
is that what I have been writing the last couple of days about the Intensives
has been an exercise in getting focused - in getting clearer about this
shift in focus. (So, the Universe gives me a car called a Focus -
quite blatant.) I mentioned to Susan that it has turned out
to be a kind of mission statement - and that is indeed true.
In answering the question "What is an Intensive
Training Day?" I was guided to become clearer on where my focus needs to
be in my life and recovery in the immediate future. I have been surrendering
to the Divine Plan and trying to figure out how to take care of my family
and create more income so that I can do that. That was a primary
motivation for starting these Intensive Training Days. But it wasn't
the Highest level of motivation. The Highest level of motivation
has to do with spreading the message - with following my path and speaking
my Truth because that is what I need to do for my recovery, for my Spiritual
Growth process.
In the writing I did below, I make mention of
the difference between codependent ego selfishness, recovery ego selfishness,
and Spiritual Selfishness. There are always multiple levels to every
thing - including our motives. Recognizing the different levels to
my motives is something I wrote extensively - and I think, quite clearly
- about in my January 2002 Update and Newsletters. (In the first
of two Newsletters attached to that Update, I also talk about "aha" intuitive
insights as an internal pager that vibrates to let us know a message has
been received - some good stuff in those Update Newsletters.)
"I learned to focus on my recovery as
my number 1 priority because it worked to make my life easier and less
painful in the long run. It took me years in recovery to really understand
all of this - and to give recovery the priority focus - but eventually
I came to understand that I could make a conscious choice to be a positive
co-creator in my life instead of a negative one. That I could start
creating cause that would have better effect.
I focus on recovery because it works. By
paying attention, being conscious and willing, I get to follow the messages
instead of forcing the Universe to use the stick on me. Choosing
to make recovery the number one priority in my life makes life easier and
less painful. Bottom line. . . . . .
. . . . . . . I have touched on the two primary
levels of motivation for me. My primary motivation out of Spiritual
Self is to follow my intuitive guidance because it the path home to Love,
to discovering my True Self, to accomplishing my Karmic mission in this
lifetime. One of the reasons that I have committed myself to following
that intuitive guidance is because of the level of motivation that comes
out of human ego self. Following my intuition makes life less painful
in the long run."
Joy2MeU Update
January 2002 Newsletter
I talked in a CoDA meeting this last week, about
how I have been forced at different times in my recovery to focus on practicing
surrender and acceptance and patience during difficult times when it was
necessary for me to really live one day at a time in faith because I couldn't
see a way out of the situation / opportunity for growth I was experiencing.
And I mentioned that in those times I would sometimes go out of balance
the other way - that is being so focused on accepting what was happening
and making the best of things one day at a time - that I would forget to
also be taking action to take responsibility for what I was creating for
the future.
"We can go out of balance with anything. I can use acceptance
as an excuse for not taking action or responsibility. I can use forgiveness
as an excuse for not standing up for myself - to avoid confrontations.
I can say I am taking care of myself when I am really isolating and indulging
in instant gratification." - The Recovery Process for inner child healing
- emotional
balance
What I am seeing clearer as I write this, is that
I have come to a point when it is time to focus on my Higher motivations
- on my mission and my work, and on taking the actions that are in front
of me - because that is what will help me to meet the other level of needs
more effectively. Focusing on the Higher motivations helps to motivate
me to take the actions necessary much better than the more mundane level
of motivation (like paying the rent.) Trying to make money has never
been a motivation that works for me, because I have so many issues around
money. (Something I talk about in my October 2000 Update that I will
be quoting below.) Following my Spiritual Path, being True to my
Spiritual / True Self - those are the levels of motivation that it is time
to focus on in this next chapter of my life, because that will help me
take responsibility for taking the actions that will make my life easier
and more enjoyable in the long run. Great insight.;-)
So, this got longer than I had hoped - oh well. Additions to the
site are in the right hand column. |
Additions to the web site since the June
2006 Update include:
Ordering info for new CD version of Codependence:
The Dance of Wounded Souls "An Audio Spiritual Experience"
Two articles from my Suite101 series on Higher
Power of my own understanding:
Vibrational
Dance
Love
as a vibrational frequency
In addition:
A new batch of wonderful Testimonials
for the book, tapes, and web site.
A testimonial for the Joy2MeU Journal on
Journal
Testimonial page
A new selection of diversified and interesting
looking links
were added.
Two book
stores in New York have stocked my book
Links to past Update Newsletters for the Joy2MeU
site (launched February 4, 1999) can be found on the Information
index page. Links to the Newsletters of my original Joy to You
& Me web site (launched February 28, 1998) can be found on the Joy
to You & Me page which list pages from that site not moved to Joy2MeU.
|
Newsletter
What is an Intensive Training
Day?
The past week or so, I have been considering whether
I should change the name of the appearances I have been scheduling to train
people in the formula I developed for codependency recovery / Spiritual
Integration / inner child/emotional healing. I believe that
at the time I came up with the name for these appearances, I was reluctant
to use the term workshop - because that term conveys the impression that
the people attending are going to have to do some work. These "Training
Days" are workshops in one dictionary sense of the term - i.e. "A seminar
or single session for training, discussion, etc., in a specified field"
- but they do not involve the attendees being forced to actively participate
in some way.
In other words, people attending these "workshops"
are not going to be asked to do exercises, or emotional processing - or
be put in a position where they feel they are being pressured to take a
risk of revealing themselves or being vulnerable. The "work"
that is asked of attendees is to be present and actively listen - to be
open to hearing that they can own the power to transform their experience
of life into an exciting adventure. Attendees have the opportunity
to absorb information that will give them a blueprint / formula for learning
to access and manifest Love into their relationship with self in a way
that helps them to start experiencing Joy and inner peace and freedom from
the past. A formula that includes practical, powerful, effective
tools and techniques for helping them overcome their fear of intimacy and
change their core relationship with self, life and other people.
These "workshops" are interactive in that participants
are encouraged to ask questions that will help them clarify and understand
the information being presented - but no one is required to say a word.
I once observed a one day workshop given by John Bradshaw in which he actually
had people break into small groups and do exercises designed to get them
in touch with their inner child wounds. There were more than one
hundred people in attendance - and he only provided 3 or 4 facilitators
to help people get through any emotional breakthroughs that might be triggered
by these exercises. I felt that it was irresponsible - verging on
unethical - to have people pressured into doing exercises that were designed
to get them into an emotionally vulnerable place, without providing an
appropriately safe environment and resources to insure that the experience
would not be a traumatic one for the participants.
I do not believe that a one day (6 to 8 hour experience)
is an appropriate setting to put people in a position to be emotionally
vulnerable with no previous work or knowledge of their issues, or appropriate
follow up resources available.
We are in the process of designing a weekend experience
- probably 2 1/2 days - as a follow up to the Intensive Training Days.
This would be an environment where people would have the opportunity to
do some emotional processing and potentially experience some grief work
in a small group setting - probably a maximum of 8 people. These
weekend workshops would be open only to people who had attended an Intensive
Training Day.
So, the bottom line is that these Intensive Training
Days I am offering, could be described as lectures - except I associate
negative connotations with that word. One of the dictionary definitions
of lecture is "to rebuke or castigate authoritatively or at length" - and
that is definitely not what I am doing in these Training Days. They
are lectures in another dictionary sense of "A discourse delivered aloud
for instruction or entertainment." And I believe that though my presentation
is designed to be instructional, it is also quite entertaining. What
I am really doing in these Intensives is sharing my experience, strength,
and hope - sharing with the participants what I have learned, what has
worked for me in my recovery.
Intensive is an accurate
term
I am not sure why I chose the word Intensive for
the title of these training workshops - but as I write this in the early
morning hours of August 11th, I have decided that the choice was made out
of intuitive guidance - and that Intensive is actually a quite appropriate
word for the experience that I am offering to those who have the willingness
and commitment to them self/Self and their recovery to attend.
In checking the thesaurus for synonyms, here are
some that I found - and why they are appropriate.
"Highly Concentrated" These Intensives
are truly highly concentrated - thick with information. But the magic
that happens in them is not a result of the attendees needing to take in
all the information. The magic happens in experiencing a shift in
consciousness that results from absorbing this information in a setting
that allows a paradigm shift - an awakening to a larger perspective of
self and life - that facilitates an opening to intuitively understanding
the dynamics of life from a much larger perspective.
"When we look at reality from a different perspective,
on a higher level, in a larger context, then we can start seeing how what
we perceive as tragedy on one level, can fit into the plan perfectly on
a higher level. How it is a perfect part of the larger picture, of
a longer journey. Then we can begin to understand how the pieces
of the puzzle fit together.
The Twelve Step Recovery process is so successful
because it provides a formula for integrating different levels. It
is by recognizing that we are powerless to control our life experiences
out of ego-self that we can access the power out of True Self, Spiritual
Self. By surrendering the illusion of ego control we can reconnect
with our Higher Selves. Selfishness out of ego-self is destroying
the planet. Selfishness out of Spiritual Self is what will save the
planet.
It is because there is more than one level of
reality that life is paradoxical in nature. What is True and positive
on one level - selfishness out of Spiritual Self, can be negative on another
level - selfishness out of ego-self. What a caterpillar calls the
end of the world, God calls a butterfly."
(Quotes in this color are from Codependence:
The Dance of Wounded Souls)
As I tell people all the time, there is nothing
wrong with who we are - we are Spiritual Beings having a human experience
- it is our relationship with our self, with life, with being human and
relating to other humans, that got so messed up in our childhood.
We have the power to change our relationship with self and life - which
changes how we relate to others. That is what this work is all about
- becoming empowered to become positive co-creators in our own lives so
that we can transform our life adventure into an exciting adventure instead
of a pain-filled, fear-driven, heart-breaking, endurance contest.
Learning how to be our own best friend instead of always feeling like we
are our own worst enemy - feeling like the victim of our own thoughts and
feelings. There is a lot of information involved - highly concentrated
- because there are multiple levels, facets, and dimensions involved in
our relationship with self, life, and everything in life. But once
we make a shift in perspective, that information starts falling in place
in a logical, rational way - the pieces of the puzzle become more visible
because we are viewing the whole experience of life, and our relationship
with self, in a larger context.
It is not necessary to learn a whole bunch of
new information - we just need to open up our intuitive inner channel to
remembering what we already Know on some level. When we stop viewing
life from the emotional perspective of a wounded child, from the perspective
of the dysfunctional programming our ego adapted to help us survive - then
we can get more clearly in touch with our Spiritual Self. And what
I teach people is a practical, powerful, effective formula for opening
up to remembering, and accessing, intuitive Truth.
"Truth, in my understanding, is not an intellectual
concept. I believe that Truth is an emotional-energy, vibrational
communication to my consciousness, to my soul/spirit - my being, from my
Soul. Truth is an emotion, something that I feel within.
It is that feeling within when someone says, or
writes, or sings, something in just the right words so that I suddenly
feel a deeper understanding. It is that "AHA" feeling. The
feeling of a light bulb going on in my head. That "Oh, I get it!"
feeling. The intuitive feeling when something just feels right .
. . or wrong. It's that gut feeling, the feeling in my heart.
It is the feeling of something resonating within me. The feeling
of remembering something that I had forgotten - but do not remember ever
knowing."
That is why I get so many people writing to me
saying they are amazed that I am saying things that they have been thinking.
We are accessing the same Source. It has just been my path to painstakingly
learn how the internal dynamics of this disease operate, and what works
to facilitate recovery from it - because it was necessary for my own recovery.
Someone at the last Intensive in LA said something very similar to something
I shared in my very first Newsletter for my original web site in 1998.
"I had someone in a workshop say to me
one time "Boy, you really know this stuff! You have really studied
this, you are kind of like an Olympic athlete or something in this area."
My immediate reaction - as it so often is - was to react out of my disease:
"That's because I was so sick." But then I caught myself and changed
it to wounded." - Joy
to You & Me Newsletter I - July 1 1998
The person in LA said something like, "Boy, I am
glad you were so f---ed up so that you really had to learn this stuff to
be able to teach it to us."
The reality is that the 6 hours or so (10 to 5:30
minus the time for breaks) that I talk in this Intensive only allows me
time to touch on some of the information that I have to share. In
sharing the information, I go off on tangents in which I tell stories from
my recovery on how I learned whatever aspect of the process I am talking
about at the time. (Each Intensive is a different experience because
the group consciousness is different - and the questions asked are different.
The tangents I go into can be in regard to romantic relationships, inner
child healing, fear of intimacy, setting boundaries, metaphysics, spirituality,
grief processing, parenting, etc. - that is part of what I meant when I
mentioned the different dimensions, facets, and levels.) The feedback
so far, shows that these tangents in which I share my experiences are some
of the most valuable information that I am sharing in the Intensives.
It is the personal sharing that helps people to really understand the information
about the wounding and recovery dynamics I am sharing. As one person
in the San Diego Intensive put it: "You can intellectually understand key
points by reading his book, but the training allowed me to really internalize
it. It's like the difference between learning how to fly an airplane
by reading a book vs. actually getting in the plane."
Some of the other synonyms are: Blood-and-guts;
Deep; Intense; Profound.
Instead of blood and guts however, I would
say Heart-and-Soul. Because this work enables a person to
get more in touch with their own Heart and Soul - the formula I share will
help you clear out your inner channel so that you get more in touch with
your own heart and soul. In sharing what I have learned, I am sharing
my Heart and Soul. Here is a continuation of the quote from my book
referenced just above:
"In this dance of life that we are doing there
are different levels - even of Truth with a capital T. There are
ultimate Truths, and there are relative Truths. The ultimate Truths
have to do with the eternal, everlasting reality of the God-Force, the
Great Spirit. The relative Truths have to do with each individual's
own intuitive guidance. These are the messages we receive individually
to get us from point A to point B on our individual paths. The guidance
we get from our Souls that tells us what the next thing in front of us
is.
Our individual, relative Truths expand and grow
as we expand and grow. We each have our own unique path to follow
- our own individual inner guidance system. No one can tell you what
your path is! Your Truth is a personal thing. Only you can
know your Truth.
It is through following and being True to our
individual Truths, as they relate to our path through this physical experience,
that we reach balance and harmony with the ultimate Truths.
I am sharing my Truth with you here. I am
sharing my heart and my Soul. I ask you, if you can, to be
aware of the emotional messages coming from your heart and your Soul as
you read this."
Deep and Profound are both definitely
appropriate synonyms for the Intensives. Intense is accurate
in some ways - except I would prefer to use the word passionate, because
I am very passionate in sharing what I have learned with people - in sharing
my Truth. It is a privilege and an honor to share the message - and
it is an opportunity to connect to the Source.
"Anytime I have a chance to speak my
Truth, to share the beliefs and knowledge which I so passionately embrace,
I get to touch the Divine. I get to be a channel for Love to flow
through. (One of the things I want to talk about in this Newsletter
is that it can be easier to be a channel for Love to flow through than
a receptacle for Love to flow into.)"- Joy to You & Me and Joy2MeU
Update10-20-2000
As I mention in this quote - from my October 2000
Update, which was probably the most important Update I have ever written
in relationship to my process - getting up in front of people to share
my Truth is something that I Love doing, am passionate about doing - because
I get to touch the Divine. My ongoing lessons right now have to do
a lot with opening to being a receptacle for Love to flow into. That
is part of what my partner Susan is helping me to learn how to do more
effectively now - and is also part of what I do when I asked you who are
on my e-mailing list for help, as I did when I needed help in getting my
book reprinted.
I want to ask you for help now in spreading the
word about my Intensives - and coming to them if it is at all possible
for you. It is a powerful demonstration of your commitment to your
self and your recovery - and also an opportunity to give to me by helping
me carry the message. An opportunity for you to take a positive action
to invest in your self/Self and your recovery - and to align your conscious
Intention in this lifetime with not only healing your self, but also with
healing the planet.
"Each human being is an energy field, made up
of interacting atomic and molecular energy fields. When people come
together they form a group energy field. Groups have incredible power
because they form a more powerful energy field than an individual does.
It is sometimes easier to access the higher vibrational transcendent emotions
in a group than as an individual.
That is why it feels good, why it feels like the
energy is powerful and positive in most Twelve Step meetings, and in some
churches and Spiritual gatherings, because it is. It is a higher
vibrational energy field.
Whenever two or more are gathered in the
name of Love and Truth, in the name of healing, there is incredible power.
Any single soul's evolution, its awakening, affects
all souls because we are all connected. We can, like Imo the genius
monkey, create a space, create a new level - a new aspect - of consciousness
that other humans then have access to. It is not any accident that
most great inventions, most great breakthroughs, were formulated in more
than one location in the same time period. Once one breaks through
and creates the space, others may follow.
A single soul's healing advances the healing of
all souls - imagine the power of two or more.
The effects of group healing and awakening ripple
out through human consciousness to affect all Souls. It ripples out
in geometric proportion."
Aligning with Truth is where the magic comes from
- through accessing the power of the Spirit. Accessing and opening
up that magic is much easier when we do it by combining our energy.
The power of coming together with a group of people committed to healing
/ recovery / Love, can concentrate that magic into a transformational experience.
The magic to not only accelerate your own recovery and transformation -
to take it to a whole new level of consciousness - but also to contribute
to healing the Human Condition. This next quote, in which I talk
about the difference between giving / helping out of codependently selfish
motives and giving out of recovery selfish and/or Spiritually Selfish Intentions,
contains a link to a page on my site about the Hundredth Monkey Effect
- which is what "Imo" the monkey in the last quote references.
"Giving and receiving are inseparable
parts of one dynamic energy exchange / flow. I mention often that
everything is both good news and bad news because there are different levels
to this life experience (what a caterpillar calls the end of the world,
God calls a butterfly) - so also, giving and receiving are two different
levels / facets of the same dynamic. When one is giving freely from
the heart (not the codependent types of giving we learned in childhood,
i.e.: giving to try to prove our worth / taking ego strength from
giving to someone we feel superior to / giving as a way of manipulating
to get what we want), one is giving to Self and Honoring the Spiritual
Truth that we are all connected. It is what I call both selfish and
Selfish (one of my phone clients who didn't like the word suggested that
Soulfish would sound better.)
It is Soulfish because I Know that giving is an
act of Love, is Honoring my True Self. Opening to receive is also
an Act of Love. Asking for help and allowing someone else to give
to me, is giving them the gift of allowing them to Honor and demonstrate
Love for their True Self - and for the Truth that we are all ONE.
It is out of Soulfish purpose that I freely share
so much information on my web site. In freely giving Love I not only
open to Love flowing into my life, but I am also manifesting Love into
the Collective Consciousness and reminding you of the Truth of who you
really are. The more of you that remember who you Truly are and open
up to Love flowing into your life, the closer we get to the Hundredth Monkey
Effect that will bring about critical mass in the energy field of Collective
Human Intellectual Consciousness and allow us to escape from the polarized
thinking that has kept human beings warring on each other for thousands
of years. (The New Age - An Age of
Healing & Joy)
It is selfish because I know that aligning with
Spiritual Truth and Metaphysical Law is what is going to make my life experience
less painful and more Joyous in the long run. . . . . .
. . . . . . If the Spirit moves you to align with,
and energetically connect yourself to, the Karmic Settlement and Positive
energy associated with being a channel for Truth and Love to manifest in
the world, then this is an opportunity." - Donations
to the Cause / Love Offerings
Being present and participating in one of my Intensives
will help you to make your life experience less painful and more Joyous
in the long run - and will allow you to help me manifest Love into the
Collective Consciousness. Absorbing the information I share in these
Intensives as part of an energy field of consciousness aligned with Love
and Truth, will accelerate your transformation and help you to become more
aligned with transforming the Human Condition. Now is that a cool
opportunity, or what?
You will get an opportunity to experience my passion
if you can come to one of these Intensives. You will get to experience
the level of emotional honesty that I have attained in my recovery because
you will undoubtedly get a chance to see me cry. One of the things
that people seem find the most helpful in my sharing, is my emotional honesty.
You will get to see me cry during the Intensive - probably from both pain
and Joy - but you won't be put in a position where you will be forced to.
Another one of the uses for the term Intensive
is in conjunction with a specified something that is heavily invested in
relative to other factors - such as energy-intensive, or labor-intensive.
In that regard, my workshops are recovery-intensive, spiritual-intensive,
healing-intensive, Love-intensive.
So, what is an Intensive Training Day?
The Intensive Training Day is an opportunity for
me to stand up in front of people and share my Truth, share what I have
learned in my recovery - as part of my ongoing commitment to manifesting
Love into the Collective Consciousness as an integral part of my recovery
process and learning to Love my self. It is a highly concentrated,
profoundly inspirational sharing of the information that I have learned
- sharing with you a formula that is practical and powerfully effective
in helping you to learn to integrate Spiritual Truth into your relationship
with self and life in a way that will facilitate learning to Love your
self and opening your own inner channel to your Self. What is required
of the participants is to show up and listen - to be present in the moment
as part of a group vibrational energy field that will facilitate a transformation
shift in consciousness in your own personal process, while also demonstrating
your desire to be part of a Transformational Healing Process for the planet.
Your willingness to show up for your own recovery will help you to open
up to manifesting more Joy, Love and serenity in your life experience -
by helping you to remember Truth and access your True Self, and by giving
you the tools to integrate that Knowledge into your relationship with self
and life. Attending an Intensive Training Day has the potential of
being a life changing transformational experience that could mark a milestone
in your journey / a new beginning / a new chapter in your life - one in
which your dance through life becomes significantly more of an adventure
that includes experiences of Love and Joy, instead of an ordeal defined
by fear and pain, guilt, and shame.
"We are involved in a process, a journey, on multiple
levels. One level is, of course, the individual level. Another
much higher level is the level of the Collective Human Soul: the
ONE Soul of which we are all extensions, of which we are all manifestations.
We are all experiencing a Spiritual evolutionary
process which is unfolding perfectly and always has been. Everything
is unfolding perfectly according to Divine plan, in alignment with precise,
mathematically, musically attuned laws of energy interaction.
Both the individual process and the larger human
process are marked by milestones. These milestones feel like endings
and beginnings, in many instances they feel like and appear to humans to
be tragedy. They are in Truth a perfectly planned series of lessons.
A perfect part of the unfolding of the Divine script. These milestones
are benchmarks in the progress of the process. They mark the beginnings
of new phases, new stages."
This Intensive experience will help you to more
clearly remember who you Truly are, and why you are here in human body
on the planet at this time.
"We are Spiritual Beings having a human experience.
We are here to experience feelings and touch and Love. The goal of
the healing process is not to reach someplace where we are above all the
human experiences and feelings. We are here to feel these feelings.
When we become willing to feel the pain, then
we become capable of feeling the Joy. The Joy of doing this healing
is incredible! Our job is to heal and enJoy. Our job
is to be. We are here to be human beings, not human doings.
Our job is to follow the Joy to the Truth.
Our job is to feel in the moment.
As long as we are reacting to old wounds and old
tapes we cannot respond to the now. The more we heal, the more responsibility
we have - that is, ability to respond. The ability to respond in
the moment.
By honoring and releasing the sadness and the
pain and the anger we can get to the Joy and the Love and the Peace.
By stopping the war within we can create world peace. Not today.
Probably not in our lifetimes. It will take generations (unless the
"hundredth monkey effect" kicks in) but the process has begun!
The planet's energy field of Collective Human
Emotional Consciousness is now positively aligned with Truth. Besides
the planet, putting the world together is not our job. Our job is
to find wholeness within ourselves. Our job is to heal - that is
why we are here."
What is happening now
On July 6th I added this announcement to the Intensive
Training Day information page:
"I had attempted to set up an Intensive
in Portland for the same weekend as the San Francisco Intensive - but have
decided to cancel it for now. I spoke of this possibility in my June
Update Newsletter:
"I did some investigation, and found
that we could get an early morning flight out of San Francisco to Portland
- that was already reasonably priced, and even more so with some credits
I had with the airline. So, I decided to try putting on two Intensives
in one weekend to minimize the travel expense. I haven't actually
bought the tickets yet - (been working on getting the rent together) -
and probably won't until July 1st or after. If I don't get any sign
ups for Portland by then, I will consider canceling it - but I don't feel
like that will be necessary." - Joy2MeU Update Newsletter June 2006
The low priced fare is no longer available, and with
no sign ups so far, I decided to go ahead and cancel the Intensive in Portland.
Hopefully, we can get there one of these days - but for the immediate future
the Intensives will be held in locations within driving distance.
There are sign ups for San Francisco - including from New York and Michigan
- so that one is a go, and I trust will be successful."
As I stated then, for the time being we are limiting
our planning of future Intensives to locations within driving distance.
The resources for purchasing plane tickets in advance, and for reserving
space for the Intensives - as well as for marketing them to a wider audience
than those of you who are aware of my web site and book - have not manifested
as yet. At this point in time - 4:02 am on August 12th 2006 - there
are only 6 people registered for the San Francisco Intensive. My
Marketing Director and life partner Susan has raised the possibility of
canceling that Intensive so that we don't incur the expense of the trip.
This gives me a perfect opportunity to turn her words back on her - something
that she is doing to me all the time. That is one of the Joys - that
at times can be very irritating (having her make a point by quoting to
me from my own book is always pleasantly irritating;-) - of being in a
relationship with a partner who is working an active recovery program.
It was Susan who inspired me to start doing these Intensives.
"Susan, my significant other (who is now the Marketing Director
for Joy to You & Me), . . . . has been pointing out how my fears have
kept me in deprivation financially. How I am spending so much time
and energy in counseling people one on one in my telephone counseling,
when there are so many people out there who desperately need to hear what
I have to share with them.
Once she saw me in action, speaking at the CoDA conference in San Francisco
in October, and saw how dynamic and passionate I am in teaching people
what I have learned - she started pushing me to set up more workshops /
appearances. It was that appearance that really helped her to understand
that what I teach people is how to radically change their relationship
with self and life into a more Loving experience - and that what I do has
very little to do with traditional counseling or therapy.
As I talked about in the Update portion of this Newsletter, the formula
for integration and inner healing that I developed is the missing piece
that so many people have been looking for. I knew that when I published
the book, and that is why I thought it would be a best seller." - March
2006 Update Newsletter Part
2
We will be doing the Intensive in San Francisco next weekend - Saturday
the 19th - even if there are only 6 people, as an affirmation of abundance
to come. And because success in putting on these Intensives is not
measured just in how many people attend or how much money energy flows
our way. Creating more financial abundance is certainly one
of the goals, but not the only - or even the most important - goal.
I would certainly like to have more people sign up. On August
3rd, in response to several e-mails I had received from people out of state
asking when we would be coming to their part of the country, I posted a
special offer for people from outside of California to come to the Intensive
in San Francisco for $150 - in hopes that it would help people who really
wanted to come, to fit the trip into their budget. I am now extending
that offer to people in California also. Anyone who reads this Update
to this point, can use the $150 option to sign up for the Intensive in
San Francisco next Saturday. In additions, any two people can come
for $275. That is the price on a special offer that includes the
Intensive, 2 follow up phone counseling sessions, and a copy of my book
and CDs. You can use the payment link for that offer to sign up for
you and a friend to attend - just include the friends name in the space
for messages if using PayPal, or in the "shipping information" portion
of the form for regular secure credit card processing (not necessary to
put an address in that portion in this case, just the name.) And
if you don't read this until the last minute, you can show up and give
us a check or credit card to pay for the Intensive for those prices at
the time you get to the Hotel.
The Intensive in Las Vegas will be held at the Circus Circus Hotel -
a good playground for inner children - on Sunday September 17th.
Hopefully we will get a good turn out for that one. Beyond that falls
into the category of the unknown / More Will Be Revealed right now.
Given the situation now, it looks like the only way that it will be possible
to do any Intensive at a distance for the rest of this year will be if
I have some other appearance in the area that pays a fee and travel expenses
to get to that part of the country. Possibilities of this type have
been raised by an organization in Oregon that has inquired about bringing
me up to speak for them - and by a person in Jamaica that is trying to
organize some appearances there. If the trip to Jamaica materializes
(that would be wonderful;-), it would probably be possible to set up an
Intensive experience on the East Coast in whatever city it is necessary
to make a plane change - either on the way there or returning. I
just got an e-mail from a New Thought minister in Canada who proposed organizing
a tour for me of New Thought centers there - but I doubt that could happen
very soon, and am not sure about the viability of doing a tour of Canada
in the winter. There is still talk of me returning to Ibiza to work
further with the people who attended the two day retreat I did there in
April of 2005 - which if it happens might allow for setting up some Intensive
dates in England on the way there or returning - but the earliest that
might happen would be February of 2007, and probably not even that soon.
I have hopes that a company that has offices in Florida and New England
will be wanting to fly me back there to do some trainings for it's employees
- but that is just a seed / idea I have sent out into the Universe right
now, not something that discussion has even begun about.
Another possibility that has come to mind has to do with the fact that
my mother is going to be doing Thanksgiving at home in Nebraska this year
for the first time in quite a few years. While my Dad was still alive
they went to Phoenix every winter - and it became kind of a tradition for
me to travel there and fly my son in from Albuquerque for Thanksgiving.
The thought that I have had, was that it would be nice to be able to take
Susan to visit the farm I grew up on in Nebraska, and have my son travel
there also - which could be facilitated by doing an Intensive in Denver
on the Sunday after Thanksgiving. If I hear from enough of you who
would come to an Intensive in Denver on November 26th, I will start planning
it. So send me an e-mail
if you would be interested.
I will probably not be doing another full Update before November - so
when I get some future dates set up, I will just send out an e-mail announcement
to all of you who are on my mailing list. If you want to get notified
when I announce new locations, you can sign up to be notified by e-mail
when the workhsop/future
appearances page changes. That page only changes when I announce
new appearances - while the Intensive
Training Day information page changes more often.
There is a chance that Susan, Darien, and I will be moving to San Diego.
(On
August 30th Robert did announce he and his family are moving
to San Diego.) It is possible that being there (where Susan
would be near her kids, and have more opportunity career wise) would help
us in spreading the message and bringing in more income. So,
there is a good chance that the next Intensive after Las Vegas could be
down that way - in October, or November if the Oregon or Jamaica possibilities
become reality for October. As usual, More Will Be Revealed.
Wishing
Joy, Love, Peace, and Abundance of all types 2 You & Me,
Robert
PS. Realizing that I have been strongly prompted
by the Universe to pay attention to my focus in relationship to what I
am creating in my life - and looking at the January 2002 Update in the
process - has led me to decide to include the quote, and some comments,
here that I started that Update with. I am doing that as a reminder
to me & you, of the Truth of who we really are.
On New Years Day of 1999, a friend sent me a quote that I had seen
previously but needed to see again at that time. I think I would
like to start off 2002 by sharing it with you.
"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful
beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness, that
most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, "Who am I to be brilliant,
gorgeous, talented and fabulous?"
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory
of God that is within us: it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously
give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fears,
our presence automatically liberates others."
1994 Inaugural Speech
Nelson Mandela
I believe that Marianne Williamson actually wrote
this and Nelson Mandela used it without attribution. (8/1/04
It turns out that attributing the quote to Nelson Mandela's inaugural speech
is one of those internet myths - something that never happened. Thanks
to John F. for letting me know the straight scoop on this.)
It is a wonderful quote in any event. In my article on New
Age Misinterpretations of Metaphysical Truth, and again in the online
book that I just finished, I express my extreme displeasure with some things
that Marianne has to say - but this is one of her gems.
The Truth that resonates in this quote is an important
reminder of who we Truly are. The natural reaction to reading this
for most codependents is to judge and beat ourselves up for not being as
en-Light-ened as we "should" be by this time.
It is important to remember the Truth in this
quote - and to remember that we need to learn to let the Light shine within,
in our relationship with ourselves first and foremost. As I discuss
towards the end of my book Codependence: The
Dance of Wounded Souls, there are some very
good reasons that we have incredible resistance to owning our power - to
owning, and opening up to, the Love and Light that is our True essence.
Shining the Light within starts with learning to stop judging ourselves
for where we are at on our path. Manifesting Love into the world
has to start at home by learning to stop giving power to the "shoulds"
and the comparisons of the critical parent voice within.
An analogy that I find useful - and have heard
myself sharing in several 12 step meetings recently - is that recovery
is like climbing a huge mountain. If I stop and look at how far I
have to go, I can feel overwhelmed - and my disease will try to beat me
up. It is important for me to remind myself that it is the disease
/ critical parent voice that wants me: to feel overwhelmed and hopeless;
to compare myself negatively to other people; and to judge myself
against false and unreasonable expectations of perfection - of where I
"should" be. The only comparison that is helpful to me occasionally
is to compare where I am now to where I used to be. (Where I used to be
in my True emotional reality - not the longing for the good old days of
denial the disease tries to get us to indulge in occasionally.) It
is important for me periodically to stop and look back at how far I have
come - and both congratulate myself for the actions I have been willing
to take to align with healing, and express gratitude for the guidance and
the miracles that have been part of my climb. Most of the time it
is best just to stay focused on what is in right in front of me, with just
an occasional glance upward towards what feels like the next milestone
I am heading for (not all the way to the top) - just to make any adjustments
in direction that may seem helpful. - Joy2MeU
Update January 2002
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November 2006
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