"Codependency continually turns back in on us. Our damaged ego causes great resistance to doing the healing work - and then turns around and tells us we are not doing it "right," not doing it fast enough, not being spiritual enough. Just this last week I had to point out to a phone counseling client how - in an e-mail she had sent me - she was shaming herself for not doing a better job of stopping shaming herself. This is nasty stuff here - incredibly powerful and treacherous is the dis-ease of codependency."On this page is the fourteenth chapter of an online book by codependency therapist/Spiritual teacher.
"In my own personal recovery, I was forced to go beyond the twelve step approach as it was practiced in Alcoholics Anonymous because I was carrying so much shame from my childhood. I was spiritually abused by a shame based religion that taught me that I was born sinful and shameful - and there was then (and is still today) too much black and white thinking and shaming, too much unhealed codependency - going on in AA for me to find what I needed there to get past the toxic shame at the core of my relationship with my self.
I also had to go beyond what I could read and learn about Adult Child Syndrome (there was no Co-Dependents Anonymous then) because my family was such a normal American family that there was no overt dysfunction or abuse to identify as the cause of my wounding - which increased the shame I felt about my being. The only way it was possible for me to start getting past the shame was to keep looking at the dysfunction I was discovering in an increasingly larger context - I had to break out of conventional paradigms. That is what led me to start realizing that the core wounding of codependency - and the original wound that was causal in creating the Human Condition as we have inherited it - was Spiritual."
"Codependency recovery is not self help. It is not something we have to do alone. Healing our codependency is a spiritual process through which we are guided by a Loving Spiritual Force."
"It is certainly not necessary for you to agree with my beliefs - but please for the Love of Jesus (or Allah, or The Goddess, or Jehovah, or whatever name resonates for you as a representation of a Loving Higher Power) and for your self, question any belief you are carrying that is blocking you from opening up to Love."
to a page of
The Web Site of Spiritual Teacher, codependence counselor, grief therapist, author, Robert Burney and Joy to You & Me Enterprises
Go to Home Page
Robert is the author of the Joyously inspirational book
The Dance of Wounded Souls
|Included on this page are
quotes from both Codependence: The Dance of Wounded
Souls and from other copyrighted work by Robert Burney. Online
pages quoted within this chapter will be linked so that they open in a
separate browser window - with the exception of any web articles referenced
which are quite long, or for some other reason not conducive to internal
linking. Links will be provided at the bottom of this page to any
such web pages.
This is Chapter 14 of a book being published online as it is written. To find out more about the genesis of this work you can go to Codependency Recovery: Wounded Souls Dancing in the Light Book 2: A Dysfunctional Relationship with Life: Author's Foreword
Codependency Recovery: Wounded Souls Dancing in the Light
Book 2: A Dysfunctional Relationship with Life
Chapter 14 A Spiritual Manifesto
Mystical Magical Spiritual Fable
". . . . . I have gotten to a point in my writing (and I feel obligated because of what I believe is happening in the Spiritual evolutionary process of human beings on this planet) where I am not going to put in a lot of qualifiers and explanations to try to soften my words for people who are not open minded. There is a saying that I heard some years ago, that I include at the bottom of some of my pages, that:Ý Religion is for people who are scared of hell - spirituality is for people who have been there. If you have experienced what a hell life can be like living according to dysfunctional belief systems, then the most Loving thing you can do for yourself is open up to considering some new perspectives. . . . . ."
"So, that is what I wrote when I thought I was writing an introduction to that article. As you can see it is direct and doesn't mince words. Another part of the reason my articles get long at times, is that I try to state things in ways that won't scare away people who are just beginning the process and haven't opened up to seeing traditional beliefs in a larger context. I am sorry if what I have to say causes anyone discomfort - but I do not apologize for saying it. It is my Truth. My mission in this life involves standing up in public and stating my Truth. It is what I need to do to settle Karma and fulfill my mission. . . . "
Expanding the Paradigm - A Cosmic Perspective
September 2005 - Chapters 3 through 15
of this work are now exclusively available in the Dancing
in Light pay to view component of Joy2MeU.com
The Miracle of The Twelve Step Recovery ProcessGrief, Love, and Fear of IntimacyJoy2MeU Update Newsletter April 2002
The Recovery Process for inner child healing - through the fearFebruary 2003 UpdateMetaphysical Pages index