"Codependency is about having a dysfunctional relationship with self! With our own bodies, minds, emotions, and spirits. With our own gender and sexuality. With being human. Because we have dysfunctional relationships internally, we have dysfunctional relationships externally.
Codependency is an emotional and behavioral defense system which our egos adapted in early childhood to help us survive. We were raised in shame based, emotionally dishonest, Spiritually hostile environments by parents who were wounded in their childhoods by patriarchal, shame based civilization that treated children and women as property."
"The point that I am making is that our understanding of Codependence has evolved to realizing that this is not just about some dysfunctional families, our very role models, our prototypes, are dysfunctional. Our traditional cultural concepts of what a man is, of what a woman is, are twisted, distorted, almost comically bloated stereotypes of what masculine and feminine really are."
"Codependence deals with the core issues of the human dilemma. Codependence has grown out of the cause from which all symptoms arise. That cause is Spiritual dis-ease: not being at ease, at one with Spiritual Self."
"We are not sinful, shameful human creatures who have to somehow earn Spirituality. We are Spiritual Beings having a human experience."
"In order to start be-ing in the moment in a healthy, age-appropriate way it is necessary to heal our "inner child." The inner child we need to heal is actually our "inner children" who have been running our lives because we have been unconsciously reacting to life out of the emotional wounds and attitudes, the old tapes, of our childhoods.
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"When I found your book, I found myself." "I am a 52 year old psychotherapist and have struggled with codependency all my life. Up until tonight I have been disappointed in the literature and treatment of codependency. Your work is brilliant! I can't find words to express my appreciation with the depth I am feeling." "Robert, you are a metaphysical Stephen Hawking. Thank you." November 14, 2008: Update Newsletter, New e-book, Kindle book, and audio download available + 2 new web sites + 2 new articles See New & News Page |
Joy2MeU = The ability to relax & enJoy being ALIVE today |
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Joy2MeU The Web Site of Spiritual Teacher, codependency
counselor, grief therapist, author, Robert
Burney and Joy to You & Me Enterprises Robert is the author of the Joyously inspirational book Codependence:
Dancing in Light with 2 online books *World map* showing location of last 500 visitors to Joy2MeU.com Testimonials for site, tapes, and book. Metaphysical Law: Giving and
Receiving ~ Donations /
Love Offerings page |
"Codependency is about having a dysfunctional
relationship with self! With our own bodies, minds,
emotions, and spirits. With our own gender and sexuality. With
being human. Because we have dysfunctional relationships internally,
we have dysfunctional relationships externally.
Codependency is an emotional and behavioral defense system which our egos adapted in early childhood to help us survive. We were raised in shame based, emotionally dishonest, Spiritually hostile environments by parents who were wounded in their childhoods by patriarchal, shame based civilization that treated children and women as property. We formed our core relationship with self in early childhood - and built our relationship with self, life, and other humans based on that foundation. Programmed to feel shame about being imperfect humans, and trained to be emotionally dishonest, we were set up to live life reacting to the emotional trauma and dysfunctional intellectual programming of childhood. Because we feel shame about being human, we have a relationship with life that does not work to bring us Joy or inner peace. We do not have the power to change others - we do have the power to change our relationship with self by healing our codependency / wounded souls. We can access the capacity to accept, embrace, forgive, have compassion for, and set boundaries with, all parts of self. Learning to Love our self will allow us to gain the capacity to Love others in a healthy way. Changing our relationship with life can transform life into an exciting adventure." ~ Robert Burney "It is necessary to own and honor the child who we were in order to Love the person we are. And the only way to do that is to own that child's experiences, honor that child's feelings, and release the emotional grief energy that we are still carrying around." "Codependence is an emotional and behavioral defense system which was adopted by our egos in order to meet our need to survive as a child. Because we had no tools for reprogramming our egos and healing our emotional wounds (culturally approved grieving, training and initiation rites, healthy role models, etc.), the effect is that as an adult we keep reacting to the programming of our childhood and do not get our needs met - our emotional, mental, Spiritual, or physical needs. Codependence allows us to survive physically but causes us to feel empty and dead inside. Codependence is a defense system that causes us to wound ourselves." "Codependence is a very vicious and powerful form of Delayed Stress Syndrome. The trauma of feeling like we were not safe in our own homes makes it very difficult to feel like we are safe anywhere. Feeling like we were not lovable to our own parents makes it very difficult to believe that anyone can Love us." "We are transcendent Spiritual Beings who are part of the ONENESS that is the God-Force. We always have been and always will be. We are perfect in our Spiritual Essence. We are perfectly where we are supposed to be on our Spiritual Path. And from a human perspective we will never be able to do "human" perfectly - which is perfect. We have been trying to do human perfect according to a false belief system in order to get Spiritual. It does not work. It's dysfunctional." Spiritual Teacher and Codependency Therapist Robert Burney, whose work has been compared to John Bradshaw's "except much more spiritual" and described as "taking inner child healing to a new level," has developed a unique approach to emotional healing that is the next level of recovery from codependency so many people have been seeking. He has pioneered an inner child healing paradigm that offers a powerful, life changing formula for integrating Love, Spiritual Truth, and intellectual knowledge of healthy behavior into one's emotional experience of life - a blueprint for individuals to transform their core relationship with self and life. Robert, whose process is firmly grounded on twelve step recovery principles and emotional energy release / grief process therapy, specializes in teaching individuals how to become empowered to have internal boundaries so they can learn to relax and enjoy life in the moment while healing. It is the unique approach and application of the concept of internal boundaries, coupled with a Loving Spiritual belief system, that make the work so innovative and effective. His personal belief is that we are Spiritual Beings having a human experience that is unfolding perfectly from a Cosmic perspective - with no accidents, coincidences, or mistakes. He considers Spirituality to be a word that describes one's relationship with life - and anyone, regardless of religious belief or lack of it (who is not completely closed minded), can apply the approach he shares on this web site and in his book, to help them transform their experience of life into an easier, more Loving and enjoyable journey. In his book Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls "A Cosmic Perspective on Codependence and the Human Condition" he postulates that Codependence (i.e. outer or external dependence) is The Human Condition - and that we have now entered a new Age of Healing and Joy in which it is possible to heal the planet through healing our relationships with self. He combines Twelve Step Recovery Principles, Metaphysical Truth, and Native American Spirituality with quantum physics and molecular biology in presenting his belief that we are all connected, we are all extensions of the Divine, and that ultimately Love is our True essence. |
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Codependence / codependency = outer / external dependence = The Human Condition 30 Pages that explain the condition of Codependence / Codependency. Includes: |
An innovative new level of Inner Child Healing - a healing paradigm that includes tools, techniques, and perspectives for achieving Spiritual integration & emotional balance. 32 pages that focus on the Process / emotional healing / integration / inner child Work. Includes: |
| What is codependency / codependence ? | Inner child healing - How to begin |
| The condition of Codependency / Codependence | Inner child healing - Why do it? |
| The evolution of the term "Codependence" | Learning to Love our self 1 of 3 |
| Codependence vs Interdependence | Union Within 1 of 2 |
| Codependence as Delayed Stress Syndrome | Fear of Intimacy |
| Emotional abuse is Heart and Soul Mutilation | Grief, Love, & Fear of Intimacy |
| Emotional Honesty & Emotional Responsibility Series 1 of 5 | Positive Affirmations 1 of 2 |
| Setting Personal Boundaries | Choosing a counselor or therapist |
| The codependency movement is NOT ruining marriages! | Grieving - examples of how the process works |
| The codependency movement and marriages! 2 Romantic love | Co-Creation: Owning your Power to Manifest Love |
| Online book in progress:
Codependency Recovery: Wounded Souls Dancing in The Light Book 2: A Dysfunctional Relationship with Life: Author's Foreword |
The Recovery
Process for inner child healing series 1 of
6 includes: Sharing experience, strength, and hope through the fear The Process of Processing |
| Chapters titles include: false
self image Codependency = conditioned programming/Pavlov's Dog Codependents as Emotional Vampires Codependency = Emotional Anorexia Normal Families are Dysfunctional Codependent Counselors Therapists Codependency in New Age Movement |
Some newly added articles:
Reprogramming our dysfunctional ego defenses Internal Boundaries - the key to balance Inner Child Paradigm Inner Awareness - Internal Census Common Emotional Defenses Recovery from Codependency |
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We are Spiritual Beings having a human experience - this is the polar opposite of the beliefs which underlie Civilization - it changes the whole game. 18 Pages on Robert's Spiritual Paradigm. Includes: |
Bill Wilson would have loved to have had the tools we have available to us today. He would have run to an ACA or CoDA meeting where he could have found the roots of the depression which tormented him. 12 Pages on disease of alcoholism & 12 steps. Includes: |
| Truth vs emotional truth | The Death of an Alcoholic |
| Loving and Nurturing self | Questions about Alcoholism |
| Powerlessness & Empowerment | Grave Emotional and Mental Disorders |
| Mystical Metaphysical Spirituality | Expectations & Serenity |
| Spirituality for Agnostics and Atheists | Gratitude |
| Spiritual Integration | The Miracle of The Twelve Step Recovery Process 1 of 4 |
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I have written a monthly column/article - first for a local paper, then for a Recovery paper in Texas, lately for the internet - for most of the last six years. Many of the pages of my web site contain the actual columns, some pages grew out of columns. 26 pages - Miscellaneous articles and columns. Includes: |
This page also includes links to 20 past Update Newsletters for the Joy2MeU web site (29 web pages), as well as testimonials & reviews (for book, web site and phone counseling) a referral page to local healers, special offers, awards, etc. 30 Informational pages + 29 Update pages Includes: |
| Empowerment | Dance of Wounded Souls Ordering information |
| Self Worth | Authors Foreword from the book |
| Emotional Incest | Authors Biographical info Updated 2/03 |
| Emotional Defenses 1 of 2 | Future Publications |
| Roles In Dysfunctional Families | Recommended Books |
| Happy Holidays, Sad Holidays | Recommended Links |
| Mothers | Telephone Counseling |
| Fathers | Joy2MeU Journal information |
| The True Nature of Love 1 of 6 | Premier Issue Joy2MeU Journal |
| Buddha, Buddhism, and Japanese cultural dysfunction 1 of 2 | Referral page to local counselors / therapists / healers |
| Attack on America - A Spiritual Healing Perspective | Find CoDA Meetings locally |
| Testimonials:
"Your writing is more insightful and instructive for change than Bradshaw and Melody Beattie of codependence no more. Pia Melody's pretty good but you're more broad thinking in concepts and more compassionate too. . . I have been in therapy since I was 19, I'm 48 and am just learning about boundaries and not from the help of my therapist unfortunately. She knows inner child work but not how boundaries directly relate to it. Your work has been an invaluable resource as I read it tonight." "Your work is brilliant and from what I've read
on your website I am just utterly blown away by this material.
It's like finally someone has put this mess of codependance into perspective
so it can be healed!" "I truly believe that I have made more progress on a personal level in the few weeks I have had Robert's book and tape than in the preceding eight plus years when I first found out what codependency was. THANK YOU" "Today, when I read some of your writing, it struck me that your perspective on philosophy, spirituality and psychology is really unique. I've read and listened to many spiritual people, but I've never found someone who combines love, acceptance and humor in such a profound manner." "After years of analysis and reading many self help books on other subjects to try to find out the answers about my struggles in my life, I had always been under the impression that the subject of codependency was a term referring to people who enable alcoholics or drug dependent people, so I never even thought to read up on it. Now, after reading your writings, a miraculous door of insight has opened up for me, and many pieces of the puzzle are finally falling into place" "I find it very exciting that you have brought the whole definition of codependence to this spiritual level, where I can much more relate to it's truth." "I can't thank you enough for the very profound spiritual healing your book on tape has provided to me. I cannot express in words that which I feel as a result of having truly "heard" your message of self-love and spiritual awakening. Your message has forever changed my path in this lifetime. Thank you so much for sharing your perceptions and experiences through your book, and your website. You are a guide and a healer, I will be forever grateful for having connected and crossed paths with you and your work." "I have been on your web site and have been reading and copying so much of your work. It speaks to my heart and soul like nothing else I have come across. I have read and studied many authors on this healing journey of mine but you really relate to all of my issues like no one else. I have read over 300 books in the past few years but you explain everything in simple but yet so enlightening truths. God bless you and you are making a difference to many. Oprah needs to read your work." "I was reading this site and it was as if you were addressing me personally. This is my story. My inner child is running my life. I am so glad I found this web site. Thank you so much. You've given me much needed hope." "I just came across your excellent site this evening, while looking for material that will assist in explaining the broader concept of "codependence' to my clients. Never before have I seen it described with such heart, clarity and with the spiritual /existential tones appropriate for discussing a dynamic so fundamental to the human condition. Thank you!!" "I love the fact that you are able to clearly bridge and tie in Christian teachings and (so-called) New Age philosophies in a clear and concise way for so many to hear at the same time." "I not only have enjoyed reading your book, but I am still enjoying listening to you on tape. I have sent one copy of the book to each of my two daughters . . . . . My wife is also reading the book, and I have referred at least a half dozen people to your website including a number of my clients. I am a counseling psychologist with a private practice in __ . . . . . I was blown away by your references to one of my favorite books "Illusions" and to one of my wife's favorites "The Book of Runes". . . Needless to say I believe that your book, your tape and your website make a great contribution to the shifting of the energy on this planet. I particularly admire the comprehensiveness of your scope. Thank you Robert for your courage, your wisdom, and your clarity, not to mention your perseverance. I'm glad to to have found another kindred spirit." "I stumbled upon your site and discovered myself.
I'm telling everyone about your site. Thank you!" "After reading your website it felt like I was drinking water after being in a desert for 30 years." (Go to Testimonials to read heart touching messages from all over the world about the book, tapes, and web site.) |
E-Mail List for Update NewsletterE-mail Robert@Joy2MeU.com
Update Newsletters are posted once every 3 months or so, and brief announcement e-mails are sent to people on the mailing list. During the time between Updates I announce any changes on my New and news page New page Privacy Statement
Joy to You & Me Enterprises is the publishing company that Robert formed to publish his book. It is a sole proprietorship with Robert as the owner and only employee. Joy to You & Me
Enterprises Original Joy to You & Me Web Site @ http://www.silcom.com/~joy2meu/ Launched 2-28-98 This site: Joy2MeU.com Launched 2-4-99
To sign up to be notified by email whenever the New page changes click here for notification. Links to past Update Newsletters can be found on the Information index page "Dear Robert, Your work has divinely touched and spiritually inspired me......I came to your site in my desperate hour and found so many truths, I couldn't hide anymore. I made the choice, to face the fear, look inside through the darkness and pain, to feel who I was and why. . . . You have given me much healing through your generous gifts that I would like to share with you my love, appreciation and gratitude. I am sending a donation ___. Thank you so very much. Blessings and Abundance Always" (Donations to the cause / Spiritual Tithes are always appreciated: Donations / Love Offerings) Would you like to recommend the Joy2MeU web site to a friend?
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