I had not really anticipated having a page just for testimonials until
just recently. With the complete redesign I have just completed of
my Joy2MeU site, having a testimonial page fit in with the overall concept
of the design - so voila, here is this page. As I was getting ready
to put this page together, on the evening of January 30th 2000, I got an
e-mail that included a link to someone's else site with a testimonial to
my site. Since I do not believe there are any accidents or coincidences,
it seemed only appropriate that I include that link here. The site
is Dr. Irene's and it is a really wonderful site. Her focus is on
abusive relationships and she is really wonderful in her approach to the
dynamics of both the abuser and the victim. Here is the link to the
testimonial on her site that includes a testimonial to my site. Check
it out http://www.drirene.com/words_of_appreciation.htm
along with the rest of her site. ~ Robert
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to a page of Joy2MeU The Web Site of Spiritual Teacher, codependence counselor, grief therapist, author, Robert Burney and Joy to You & Me Enterprises.
Go to Home Page
Robert is the author of the Joyously inspirational bookThe Dance of Wounded Souls.
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I am now posting testimonials about
once every 4 to 6 months.
(July 4, 2008) "I cannot thank you enough for your website. i came across is recently when i was in a crisis and am working through ALL of your articles. You saved my life!" "Your site is fantastic. The abundant amount of information that you have provided is exceedingly beneficial to the recovery community. It is so incredible that you have so much information to share with others." "I've been having a rough couple of months lately, and so I was searching the web for some answers and stumbled across your website. The articles have been so helpful and have really opened up a lot of barriers within myself and have answered/created a lot more questions. It has definitely helped me with my personal growth. Thank you so much for your work, it will most certainly help others and it is really a wonderful gift you are giving to put so many articles on the internet for others to find and gain knowledge from." "I have read some of your passages on your websiteÖI am a 41 yr old male that has been divorced for 7 years and has had poor success with finding that next relationship. I recently had a relationship end that brought to surface some incredible grief that was so incredibly depicted in your long excerpt from the Joy2MeU Journal in which you were talking about different levels of letting go." "Just so you know, I found your site on google.com, and the information there helped me immensely yesterday and gave me hope when I needed it." "My girlfriend went off on me today and I googled how to get over an obsession because I wanted to break up with her but I am very in love wither her. I get to your article and I really have to say it moved me. I felt like the article was written about me. Broken house the CONSTANT worrying... everything. I have a fear that if I break up with this girl my world will end. I really think you helped me not get over her but really help myself " "I have enjoyed exploring your web pages." "Thank you for your website...you offer some ideas and insights with issues I've been struggling with. I saw it before (perhaps a year ago) and read it a few times. I found it again this last week and have been reading through it. It's been very helpful...thank you." "I am 30 years of age and have been struggling to cope with my inner children - i didn't understand this until i came across your website. As soon as i started reading about all my inner children.... the words sreamed out at me "This is your life. Now i know what's going on!" "A few days before i found your website i had a very bizarre experience where i woke up and jumped into a 3 hour conversation with my inner child. No longer screaming and able to talk to me. I had recently taken up Emotional Freedom Technique and this experince came about because i had tapped into something extremely overwhelming... I have now discovered how much healing i still have to do and have found your website a fantastic help - you spend so long living with something you sometimes forget what it is or how to word it. I needed to find the words - thank you!!" "I have found a lot of healing in just reading the articles. I have never heard anyone else say that they woke up and just wanted to die too. It makes sense now. I don't feel suicidal but see how that has been an unconcious driving force behind a lot of my behaviors." "Your site is amazing and I am grateful that it is out there for all to see. It is also very true. I have enjoyed reading it and still have more to explore within your site." "In November, I went online and did a search for ìinner child healingî and your sight came up. I had no idea how much in return I would get for that search. Your writings resonated with me so deeply and powerfully, and I have to tell you that many times a week I say a prayer out of gratitude for what you have shared." "I have found your website an immense treasure of wisdom and healing for me. Thank you so much." "thank you so much for sending me the book. my friend had it and i read it and it was so powerful i decided to buy one. i have been in recovery since l990 and am half american and half british. you spoke from the soul and the heart, everything is about love. i was diagnosed aids in 1993 with three hospitilazations and 50 tcells, i am now 62 this year and became a grandmother yesterday, i now have 430 tcells and havent been ill since 1995 with a combo of 12 step recovery modern medicine and powerful alternatives practically vegan now. all my hiv friends have cancer etc because they chose to leave 12 step and are back on the poisons of modern day. i have cherokee blood in my veins and wondered if you had native blood. i am in tune with the great spirit and the earth now and have a good life. thankyou so much for your beautiful words. they were powerfull words from a man on a good journey, in love and fellowship" "I have been reading and learning so much from your website. YOU understand me. What a gift that is! Thank you so much for the website." "I want to thank you for all the work you've done on co-dependency. I have your audio book, Dance of the Wounded soul, and I found it very enlightening." "Even the small amounts I have touched on he website have opened my eyes, my mind and my heart. My life has already begun to change with the first tears that began to roll down my cheeks. When you feel so empty and alone for so long and then realize you are far from alone and there is genuine hope, it is life changing. Thank you again." "I wanted to say that I love your site and youíve really helped me in times when Iíve needed it most." "Thank you for the priceless gift that is your book: The Dance of Wounded Souls. I found your site while googling "how to stop obsessing." And as it always is, I found exactly what I needed exactly when I needed it. As a gift to myself for my thirtieth birthday in March I made the conscious decision to end my near half decade opiate addiction and allow myself to feel the emotional pain and face my Reality, for a greater purpose. At 30, I am just beginning to feel and find who I really am- it's so painful and wonderful and scary and everything all at once! Your book and website- your understanding and explanation of codepedency, is helping me tremendously with my process. In addition, you have reinforced my belief that some men can and do discuss feelings and emotions honestly and openly... and even want to! I also want to thank you for re-assuring me I'm not crazy! Your Truth and my Truth are so in-line with one another I felt an instant cosmic connection :-)" "thank you for such a great and extensive web site." "i absolutely *loved* how you described the evolution of the term 'co-dependency' on your wounded souls tape -- i see it exactly the way you described it!!! i have never been in a relationship with a chemically dependent person, and yet i found that many of the things being discussed at co-dependents anonymous meetings were *my* issues! i found CoDA in the late 80s, and went to meetings (at *least*, and usually more often than) once a week, until i had my ten year chip! it was a *wonderful* experience, and the beginning of my spiritual journey. i also went through a month long treatment program at the 'bradshaw center' in los angeles in 1990 and did a *lot* of family of origin work, and healing of my inner child(ren). although i'm not in therapy anymore, i attend a unity church and am addressing the *spiritual* aspects of my healing now!" "Thank you for posting such valuable information. Your work is appreciated!!" "Thanks for the great website. I wanted to thank you for all the work you put into your website. I am a recovering abuse survivor, and I'm trying to set boundaries with a very codependent, emotionally manipulative friend. The information on your site is helping me stick to my boundaries without getting drawn into her drama. Thanks for the great work!" "i absolutely adore your writing." "It is with great honor that I write to you to let you know that I was guided to your website and since that day but only a few weeks ago...I have the knowledge to understand that you have a great handle on the TRUTH of this realm." "Your book Codependence: The dance of wounded souls and cd set have really resonated deeply with my own healing journey and experiences. Thank you for such a giving and resourceful website." "My name is _____ and I am currently training to be a psychotherapist. I live in Ireland and am studying in Dublin. I just wanted to email you to thank you ever so much for all your postings on the Joy2MeU site. I have read your words many many times and still revert to them on days when I am feeling particularly vulnerable. I have taken so much strength and encouragement from your words. Everyones inner journey is different and yet I relate to so much of what you have written, it makes me feel less alone as I continue on my journey towards healing." "I am looking forward to reading your book, as your writings on your website are great (and helpful)." "This letter has been stimulated by my discovering and reading your web site. As I went through it, I found much that I appreciated and heartily agreed with . . . . I came to CoDa almost seven years ago, after a search of many decades. It felt like home to me and has continued to do so. For me too, CoDa is a path of spiritual growth more advanced and more consistently effective than any other I know about. Many of your comments in your web site are reaffirmationís of understandings and experiences that have come to me also through the program. And your book "The Dance of Wounded Souls" is being read by a number of members of my regular group and they speak highly of it as supporting their recovery process. I like that you see the issue of codependence as a crucial insight clarifying larger sociological and political processes. This capacity of codependency theory to cast light on other aspects of life demonstrates its value and usefulness. . . . I am glad to have discovered your site and hope it gets the attention it deserves." "Your work has been of great benefit to my growth, thank you." "I have been reading many different books on codependence, recovery, and inner child healing. I came across your website a couple of weeks ago. It has been very helpful! Some of the most informative and understandable information I have read so far. . . Thanks for giving so much free info on your website. It shows you care about helping people and I personally am very thankful." "Thx for your insights on your web site I keep coming back to it time and time again as I ìGoogleî the latest phase of my life I am trying to come to grips with." "Yes I am enjoying your website and know I found it by Divine direction. :) Doing some homework from my last therapy session I was led to it and it has answered a lot of questions for me. My therapist asked me to ask myself this week what my fear of intimacy was due to my pattern of wanting to run away a lot and also picking men who are unavailable. Truth is....and don't laugh too hard.....this was after I told her I had filled out some forms for a placement service for the religious life. She said _____ A convent would be the ultimate form of running away and you wouldn't make a good nun! LOL Truth is I wasn't really sure what intimacy was because I have been running from it for years. When I finally just let it come up the word and the feeling I got was "death". I thought death? Why would one feel that way about intimacy? How odd. Then I realized I didn't even know what intimacy was. So I googled why do people run away from intimacy and up comes your site. It has been so wonderful and enlighting! I have been reading it off an on all weekend. After reading I realized I feared both abandonment and engulfment. I love my therapist and she has really really helped me but I feel at some point I will be calling you for phone counseling. Yes, please put me on your newsletter list. I will look into the Cruise but am hoping that you will put on an intensive in the midwest some time. Thanks again Robert for your generous heart! Your website must help a lot of people." "I look forward to recieving the your book - I stumbled across your website at a very difficult time in my life and as I began to read the various entries it felt as if a veil was lifted and for the first time in my life I began to understand how I came to be in the place I have found myself, and perhaps how I can get to where I want to be. Thank you for your generosity in sharing so much wisdom with others via your site." "I read about grief of deprivation,that you wrote,today,and yesterday I had it.You said,the universe send us the mesegges,and thats thruth.For me is hard to believe,that you write exactly about the deepest mental proceses,and thoughts,and feelings,that I have.fear of intimacy is realy a serious isssue,something The Universe tells me I shoud work on.Becouse,I suffered of sexual deprivation,and then if even a Beautifull woman tries something,I reject her....later I cannot understand why did I reject her,and stay alone sexualy deprived.See,how strong are emotinal wounds.Anyway again,I am thankfull To You for imposing your knowledge on the internet,for free.." "I am really looking forward to receiving the book. From looking at your website, I feel your approach and understanding resonate very well with me. I have only recently come to a greater understanding of my patterns and your thoughts have helped me to put that into words and to find in that a sense of hope.Thank you," "Wow! Robert, your message and the insight it contains needs to be made known to the world! You are truly an amazing gift." "I am very new in my walk to overcome my co-dependency issues. Your website has given me the courage to move forward with hope that in time I can have a happy and emotionally healthy life." "I would just like to say that I thoroughly enjoy reading your site and find it very rewarding. It has really helped me moved forward with problems I have had from an abusive childhood and I hope to book some telephone counselling sessions with you in the future, which I hope will move me on even further. By the way, I found this on youtube the other day and thought you might be interested to hear it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ICLp0gmkrYM Thank you for being so generous." "I am looking to heal myself and I am progressing well but I realize the more you learn the more you have to learn -- it gets painful and it gets dark. I have been visiting your website and reading your articles regularly and I find that so much of what you write resonates with me. Thank you for your insight and your work. I hope that one day I can help others as you have done and continue to do." "your Web site has been a great comfort to me." "Thank you for the newsletter.. i find them very helpful..this vibrantly beautiful spiritual being is greatful" "This is wonderful stuff...found it by mistake. Are you a psychologist?if
not you should be. my brother is a serious alcoholic..hes in hospital
now with dts.....and when he is happy..he says"it is not allowed"but when
asked he doesnt know or wont say and he gets vioces saying he is bad etc.
"I am a Unity Minister. . . . I am not sure how I found you...I do know it was surfing and I think it was when I was looking for stuff on codependency. . . . . I love your site. You have really "given" us a gift on your site Robert. You give alot and I really appreciate it. I find your writing and thoughts very profound, clear and thought-provoking. I resonate with your writing." "My spiritual partner stumbled upon your site yesterday searching for information on Inner Child Work. I have been doing a lot of personal healing work and growth over the last 15-20 years. Your site and the articles are wonderful. Connecting it all with our spirituality, karmic healing and balancing, Christ-consciousness and more is AWESOME!!!! Wit wll take a while to get through that which resonates (which is a lot of it). Thank you and may you be continuously blessed for the wonderful work you do!!!" "It's only really been in the past three days since i've been devouring your articles that i feel the full healing and the acceptance coming in. I don't feel guilt and i know that the guilt was never mind to feel. The people i have hurt with my actions will either forgive or will hold on to that anger from their own conditionings. I just wanted to say thank you for the insight into all this and that I believe i have finally realized that if we don't love ourselves, we cna't really love others. and if we can't make ourselves happy, no one else can either. " "I received your book and was so appreciative that you took the time to write a note of encouragement. Thank you for that. You should also know that your book is great. I thank you for taking the time to write it." "Thank you Robert. I found your website full of great info. As I am processing a long marriage of 24 years, that is now ending in divorce, your information on your CD and book are relevant to my healing and moving forward without a partner until I am strong enough to stand on my own. Thank you so much for compiling this information for Wounded Souls to find a healing way." "I just read the above article on your web page. (Obsessive thinking Part 2) The entire article describes what I am living right now. Thank you for the suggestions within the article." "Your articles have given me such insight and have been so helpful in opening my eyes to see myself differently and give me the "permission" to like myself and appreciate the beautiful gifts God gave me. I never knew I was of any value. Thank you so much for your perspective and thank God your work fell into my life just when I needed it the most." "I bought your book a couple of years ago. Reading it has been a catalyst for my personal and spiritual growth and getting in to a choice based program. I am beating Co-Dependency and for the first time in 46 years I love myself. I look to myself for satisfaction and fulfillment and not another human being or thing. The Journey has been worth it even while it was hard. Thank You for sharing your experiences!" "I've been enjoying your metaphysical approach to relationships via your website. I'm looking forward to receiving the CD's and listening to them in my car on my way to work." "Thanks for the book and CDs. I've read a lot of your web site pages on-line, but the book and audio CD reading of it, really hit home. I'd first found your site, about a year ago, but wasn't ready at that time to really get into the deeper work I've embarked on now. I'm sure your materials will be a great help to me." "I am a 21-year who just graduated form undergrad and am in my first semester of Grad school. All of your words ring very true in my heart and it's like all these bells and whistles going off in my head. Often it is those of us who are most sensitive, kind, and compassionate in our hearts that are hurt most by parents and people who stumble blindly around with their own wounded selves and since we feel that we must somehow heal them we become very wounded ourselves." "I love what I've read on your website. " "I would have loved to attend your workshops because your words so resonate with the forgotten knowledge in my soul. I have yet to read everything (the Universe has led me to you but 3 days ago), but already you have brought me much clarity and comfort and hope. I live all the way here in the Philippines, so making it to the workshops is pretty tricky. (-% Still, who knows, we do travel there every now and then. Next trip I'll be sure that it coincides with some of the sessions. Thank you so very much for sharing your wisdom with us. I will have you know, that you just spared me my sanity." From India: "I appreciate the commendable work you have done!!" "i have found your book - dance of wounded souls beyond description. i am in a twelve step program. my mother died a few years ago and i need the stuff in your book to be true. it has such a ring of truth to it unlike anything else i ever read. i have tried many scams before but i don't find anything about your words scammy. and i am a very skeptical questioning person." "Your website is amazing and I have recommended it to my fellow counselors. at the very least, I will order your book, to help me, and hopefully eventually my clients. . . At any rate, thank you for your site and your honesty and I look forward to reading your book" "The information you're giving out is amazing!" "l stumbled across your website about four years ago when l started taking a dance around pandora's box. Well lets say l had a peak and it scared me, the thing is as you know once it's open... it's open. Well four years later lm starting to delve deeper, really peeling those onion layers! Tonight, l had some emotional clearing come up and tried to squash it down until l could no longer and the tears came rolling down. When it was over l got onto the net and guess what? After, four years l stumbled across your website again! l wanted to thank you for the literature you have provided on your site it is very helpful and the style of your writing is reassuring. l even managed a giggle when l read "I would end up crying in a rubber room for the rest of my life. That if I ever really owned the rage, I would just go up and down the street shooting people". May you be the recipient of many blessings " "Just wanted to thank you for all the awesome material you have made available free online!!! I am looking forward to getting your books.. my Spiritual Partner and I are both excited about finding this material" "Hello. I have to say that when I read your article on "Fathers", particularly the part about the additional way that fathers wound their daughters, I felt completely validated. For years it was a joke in my family that "Daddy stopped hugging me when I got boobs." But it was true! I had been a daddy's girl until I hit puberty and then I couldn't do anything right...not that I could before, but I really was dealt his wrath after I developed physically. . . . . . Thank you for putting in print the feeling that has dominated my life for the last 30 years! It is liberating to know that I wasn't alone or ridiculous for feeling this way. Perhaps now I can begin to heal." "Just recently, I read some of your writings on co and counter dependency and was amazed to see how well the descriptions that you provided were so right on the money, as a description of our parents, while growing up, and that made no sense to me as a child, as well as all the stress and frustration produced for all of us." "I am enrolled in a Clinical Pastoral Education Program at the Veteranís Hospital in ____. A large portion of our program is Psychotherapy training and WOW am I glad I stumbled onto your web site. I ordered your book ìThe Dance of Wounded Soulsî and I am very excited to learn more. I, being co-dependent myself, think that this book and some of the other points brought up on your website help drag out some really deep issues into the light. Thank you and please keep up all the great writing!!" "Your website is totally amazing. I stumbled upon it recently while looking for articles related to obsessive thinking - in order to heal my own. What I found was information on that topic and so much more. Thank you for publishing your work like this, making it so easily accessible and understandable. I'm on to reading about romantic relationships, with hopes that I will also find answers and healing within your articles. Thank you for your colossal efforts in putting this website together. Please know that they are helping me, and I'm sure many others, tremendously." "Thank you for your writings. They helped to convince me of my issues that I have been facing in life. I suspected the cause but I needed to confirm the insight. Your writings have assisted in that regard." "I just wanted to express my gratitude for supplying such eye-opening
information on your website. It is so greatly appreciated! . . .
The reason I am sending this lengthy, way too much information e-mail,
is to thank you, because I stumbled across your website just today when
doing a Google search for "personal
boundaries," because I had absolutely no clue what that meant, and
I'm waiting for self-help books arrive and counseling to start.
"I HATE TO KEEP COMPLIMENTING YOU BUT I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF YOUR WRITING. THANK YOU SO MUCH."
August 3, 2003 - A number of the testimonials I am adding today include queries about where to find my book Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls (clicking on the title link will take you to my ordering page) In my January 2002 Update I addressed the issue of where people can find my book, because it is a pretty common for people who find the site to assume that they can go out and find my book at their local book stores. Unfortunately that is not true in most cases. - 9-7-03 Decided to leave this here for anyone who does want to find the book. |
"I want to thank you for all of your wonderful articles on your site. I have been searching for so long for an answer and when I found your site I was so excited I cried. It seemed like everything I read you wrote just for me right down to the part about your last relationship. . . I have never felt so peaceful in my life though and I have hope. Thank you so much and I hope you are blessed beyond measure."
"I continue find your website a fabulous tool to assist with the business of a real life. Thank you."
"I have been tirelessly reading your online articles and they have been of great help to my healing. I find myself emerging from suffering and confusion into happiness, understanding and serenity. It must be an amazing feeling to know that you have brought peace and happiness to so many. With love and deepest gratitude."
"Thank you very much for sharing on your web pages. I found the way you write so honestly about your own experience very moving, and there was so much I could identify with."
"I have spent a lot of time on your website the past month and recently purchased your book Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls. I absolutely loved it. I can not thank you enough for your work. Thank you for opening up your heart and soul. Reading your book and the writing on your website has brought me so much peace and comfort at a time when I needed it most. . . . I am currently writing an autobiographical book and would like to know if I can use parts of your book as quotes included in my book. I can honestly say that you have explained my life through your book and also changed my perspective on how I view life forever. By profession I am a Psychiatric Nurse and will be incorporating this invaluable information in to my practice. It is going to allow me extend a wonderful path of healing to many.
I want you to know I am thankful for knowing about you. Thank God there are people like you out there spreading the good news. This is something that is going to transform the world. Again, thank you for all you do. Also, thank you for signing my copy of your book. I appreciate you taking the time. much love..."
"I love your book--I think it is genius"
"I accidentally- no let me rephrase that - I went onto google and typed "self love" your website was one of many that appeared. My soul led me to your site - I am completely wow'd. It's just what the dr ordered. I have not read the material on it in concetration but have skimmed through the pages and I am wow'd. I've printed some stuff which I'll be reading tonight at home - I cant wait. Thanking you for such a lovely website of enlightenment - I hope to get more from your site and will advise you accordingly and if there's anything to add I will do so."
"Thanks for the amazing work you have done on your own recovery and for your courage in sharing that process with other sufferers. Over the last week or so I have spent hours reading, thinking and feeling about a great deal of the information on your website. When you describe the illness of co-dependence, you are writing my biography. I have already gained a new perspective on my life and some hope for a different future from the material you have provided."
"Your website is quite amazing and anticipate it taking me a very long time to get through it all."
"I wanted to say that I find your website very educational and helpful. I can relate to so much of what you say. . . . Thank you so much for providing so much helpful information on codependency... You really are a blessing!"
"I read your book "The Dance of Wounded Souls" yesterday. And again today. The first time, I could hardly get through it. I had no idea what you were saying. Yet, a few passages resonated and I decided that I needed to re-read the book. I have found your book, for me, to be life changing. I am 43 years old and I don't believe I have ever known the "gut" feeling of Truth that I had when I understood that my inner 5 year old was "driving my bus" (and has been for as long as I can remember). Codependence has been SO EXPENSIVE in every way in my life that I can't even describe it. I am still reeling from this first hint of recovery. I have been attending CoDA for about three months and have introduced myself as "codependent". The next time I share, I will use "recovering codependent"."
"I just wanted to send you an email to thank you for all your work on codependency - it has helped me greatly in so many many ways"
"I just wanted to say, I have been visiting your site for a little more than a year. I also have a copy of your book. I have benefitted so much from your writing, and I even found ACoA because of it. . . . The second thing is that I think you are too apologetic about your pay section of your site. I was happy to pay. You have given so much to me. If people do not wish to pay, then I think that it is their own problem. But I was more than happy to pay, and actually a little off-put that you had apologized for having a pay section. You need to make money too, and you are helping people in the best way possible! All power to you!"
"I am enjoying your writtings Thanks for making then available"
"Hey, I really like this article on Happy holidays, Sad holidays. I am just noticing this year as well that I am around my friends and feeling deeply sad, and I hadn't been thinking about the joy I also feel. Reading this article reminds me that, yes, I can feel more than one feeling at once. I can feel deeply sad, that might be the strongest feeling, but when I define my self in that moment by it then it is an untruthful accusation. I am not "sad" or "suicidal", I am feeling sad but also lots of other things. Thank you for writing this article for this time of year :) I appreciate having it to read when I am going through this time, and likely to forget some of the subtler details."
"I appreciate your site and your words."
"I love, love, love, did I say, love your book! "The Dance of Wounded Souls" is what I hope everyone in my group will have the opportunity to read. I have looked for a book like this all my life. Like I said in a previous email, I was sitting here minding my own business and your name appeared. I am so grateful for the Divine unfolding. I can't thank you and Him enough. My journey has been a long one. I wouldn't change a thing. Your book feeds my soul."
"I found your website very valuable. So much made sense to me and my life at the moment."
"I found your wesite last night and I amazed at how it describes me to a "t". I know I can benefit greatly from Robert Burney and Joy to You and Me. Thank you."
"Tonight I have spent 5 hrs off and on the computer, discovering that yes, indeed, there's a factor of co-dependency alive and well in me. I started out looking for something for someone else, and ta da -- found me. Why am I not surprised? Ultimately, I have found your site, and tho I haven't read an nth of what I shall, I've read enough to believe you (your site) will be a valuable resource. Thank you for the massive amount of work that has gone in to making the site, for the journey to Self that you openly and freely share, and for the continued work you carry forward."
"Hi. I find your essays on boundaries very helpful."
"I've just found your web site and am thrilled with the contents,i've also ordered the book and cd set as well,i've been in recovery for a number of years and am just now getting to the core issues,,my relationship broke up 8 month's ago with my partner,,a very sick individual,,,and i've been in an awful lot of emotional pain since,,,they've moved on with ease,,(when you dont look at yourself it's easy to do that),,any how i just wanted to say thank you and i look forward to dissecting this site and soaking it in,,it was found at the perfect time on my part."
"I found your information by Googleing "How to stop obsessive thinking." I loved what I read and it all has fit me to a "T.""
"I want tell you that I am so grateful that I have found your website. I have had revelations on my condition from reading your through your writings. I can deeply relate to so much of what you have written. Its like you have followed me around my entire life and wrote it just for me. Your writings have helped me tremendously."
"Dear Robert .... Thank you! While doing some searches on Jesus and Mary Magdalene and related topics, I stumbled into your sites .... divine intervention. . . . I am overwhelmed to find confirmation on your website of many conclusions I have come to myself through independent study, meditation, dreams, and prayer. . . . . I had never before reading your website connected "Wounded Inner Child" as a form of PTSD .... it makes incredible sense, and I will certainly keep it in mind in my counseling work....and in my own life!"
"It feels like a miracle that I found your site."
"I am very much looking forward to getting started on a path to recovery. I have purchased an intial telephone counseling session. I have read your book and listened to the tapes over and over again. I put the tape on when I go to bed at night, when I wake up in the middle of the night I put it on and when I wake up in the morning, I listen to it. I have done this for the last five days in a row. I want to do the work that needs to be done."
"I have not contacted you in awhile. we did a few phone counseling sessions in the past and I have emailed you from time to time. I wanted to wish you a Happy Holiday. Your website has guided me on my path of trusting the universe. It makes sense out of the nonsense and I am grateful for you. So again thank you."
"I have tears of thankfullnes at receiving your reply! It has given me even more hope to explore and understand the impact of my "childhood" and inner child that is getting in touch again. I shall continue to visit your site and will be buying your book as soon as possible! I live in the Netherlands and am so glad to have acsess to you via the internet.......Thanks again so much for your time and efforts to pass on your knowledge and experience."
"It was some time I contacted you to thank you for you book......I beleive I contacted you from a different email back than. Since dealing with my child hood abuse issues and learning to love myself I have come out of the closet. I am walking in love and peace with my husband and he is handling things pretty well considering. I wanted to thank you as your book and site helped me out so very much. . . . Much love to you and thank your for all your loving support."
"What a great heart you have. I feel really lucky to have found you and your work."
"I started finding web-sites like yours it gave me clarity, WOW!!!!!, when I found you're site holy shit!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! . . . I can tell from you're site you are full of compassion and will give me some advice."
"My therapist gave me a series of articles to read which prompted me to go to your website. What I have read so far has been incredilby helpful."
"Hi Robert, my name is ______ and i just want to start by sayin a big THANKs to you for the work you are doing. It has been invaluable to me on my own journey of healing! I can only imagine the countless others that you have helped, it seems without much thought of personal gain! . . . I love the emotional healing aspect of your work, which certainly resonates strongly with me!"
"Since I have found the website, joy2meu, I have been profoundly enlightened"
"thank you so very much your book has touched my life greatly, I have been recommending it to everyone I know~ I sure orders will be coming in soon~ but mostly I pray that it will touch my friends and all others that I have suggested to purchase your book , and it will inspire them to make a change in their life for the better~ Again, I wish I had the time to tell you my story, it has been an amazing journey~ from a extremely abusive childhood to homeless to almost losing my life from a 21 year eating disorder ( praise God ~ I have recovered, out of 5 of my friend's I was the only survivor)~ So in short~ thank you and God blessings upon your life,"
"Thank you for your exceptionally useful, wise and insightful site, Joy2MeU. . . the content of the site is adult, well researched and deeply meaningful."
"I don't usually send letters to writers, musicians or other famous people, but as I looked over your site again I just thought why not send thank you? 3 years ago when I discovered I was addicted and codependent, I read your site ALOT along with books by Melody Beattie and Pia Mellody and I absolutely thank you from the bottom of my heart for having your writings online and accessible to all, it's a beautiful gift to your fellow mankind and is so helpful. I had no idea about boundaries. Now I protect myself a lot better and am a much nicer person :)"
"Thank you for your amazingly helpfull site."
"I am so happy to see that your webpage still exsists. It's been many years since I have been on but your webpage was there, when I needed it most. I learned so much about life with you and your understandings. . . I just referred your page to friend and I thought hmm.. I should go on it too. Can't wait to start reading again and healing another part of my life."
"Thank-you for everything you have posted on your website!!! Your revelations you have typed about Co-Dependency are truly already transforming me, and truly truly I am full of joy for finding this, and giving all the glory to my beautiful God!!! :) I know He lead me to your site!!! I am so happy, this is exactly what I needed at this time! :)"
"Thx for your response, I really appreciate it! I can only imagine how busy you are!! Thx again for sharing with me, I will do some reading. You are truly gifted and in the Divine Flow. May God continue to bless you"
"I did not expect to hear back from you personally, what a pleasant suprise. When I googled obsessive thinking and your website came up, I could not stop reading your articles. I had to purchase the book. I look forward to reading the book!"
"your website has been very helpfull."
"You have no idea how deeply you have touched me! I am a little boy who was prevented from exposing my emotions. Now, I am a person, not yet a man, who was not able to express my emotions to myself or anyone else. I've been reading your information now for the past four days, and I can't stop gleaning the information that I crave. For the past three days, my spare time after taking care of the everyday things that need to done, is spent reading your works and then evaluating my inner self. I have never had such a clear view into why I am the way I am. I've sought out the help of a friend, who is a therapist and I believe that I am on the path of recovery now. I at least can see a light at the end of the tunnel, or that black hole that you so vividly depict. The therapist that I am in contact with is hired by the Police Dept that I work for, just to ride with each of us every once in a while for us to bounce things off of. Through my interaction with him and the descriptions that you offered of going through that black hole, I can tell that he has already done that in his own healing. He is a recovering alcoholic. It is my goal/hope that one day I will be a person that is capable of Love and being Loved. I think that as that occurs, I will not be the lonely little boy full of saddness and insecurity any longer! I just wanted to say Thank You for putting your experiences out there for others to find and use to their benefit."
"It was wonderful to receive your holiday message (referring to December Update) and I will be sharing it with our Nar-Anon Group. Blessings to you and your family too!"
"thank you for the great work you are doing Robert. I continue to be one of your supporters and admirers and quite often give out you web site to my own clients."
"I cannot even begin to express how much your writing has profoundly impacted my life. I discovered your writing when I set out to find out why I continually found myself in abusive relationship after abusive relationship despite recognizing the signs of abusers. An internet search took me to your writing on emotional incest which I read in absolute amazement as it described my relationship with my father with astounding accuracy. I continued to read the other writings on your site and could not order Codependence, The Dance of Wounded Souls quickly enough. Your writing paved the path for my discovery and identification with Adult Children of Alcoholics. I embarked upon the journey to the core of the tightly weaved layers of the dysfunction in my family and the manifestation of the dysfunction throughout my entire life. I often read aloud passages from your book, and this piqued the interest of others and I soon found myself introducing the concepts from your writing to them. I suddenly knew with absolute clarity the direction my life was meant to follow, and made the decision to pursue a PhD in Counseling Psychology, and will start in the fall."
"i find your site very informative and can relate to some of the information and some of the other info certainly gives me a different perspective."
"I have just read through part of your site (I'm new to it) and write to express my gratitude to you for your writing about the process of your relationsip (1998/9). I realise this is old 'history' now and you are doubtless moved on to continuing life adventures. Nevertheless, writing about your own process has given me MUCH clarity about a recent relationship/ending. I have been in a screaming heap over this but am now starting to put together the story that fits, and through this process, start to believe (and SEE actually) that I am now more likely to have the thing I want which is a (real) relationship. Thank you."
"I've just read your book and found it to be extraordinarily helpful."
"I poked around the web looking up emotional child abuse and trust issues. I found your site and all became clear. . . I have dealt with so much that I am sort of bummed there is plenty more to uncover release and heal, but I have come far enough to know this wounded part of me is not all of me."
"So I got on the internet and the first thing I came upon was your website. The first paragraph of Obsession/Obsessive thinking part 1 hit like a rocket. ìBeing in our heads ? thinking, fantasizing, ruminating ? is a defense we adapted in childhood to help us disassociate from the emotional pain we were experiencing. WOW!!!!! This has been my life since the age of 5 years. I donít know of any other way to live. I can tell you that I just canít bear the thought of living the rest of my life with this pain."
"I would like to express my gratitude to you for your website. . . . I wrote, mainly, to let you know that your site, your words, your insight, your guidance served as footprints next to me in the sand tonight. I was asking for guidance to calm me and a term popped in my head. "Obsessive Thoughts". I Googled this term and found you. Funny thing is that I have been writing about Joy and me/you, you/me......today I was contemplating renaming myself Joy. All just hints so I would recognize your site. Syncronicity never ceases to amaze me. "
"Just wanted to say, brilliant work. My wife and I are both incest and child abuse survivors and learning what weíve learnt from your website has pushed our individual recoveries far further along than we could have previously imagined. So thank you.
I made this posting on survivors forum: I would recommend that everyone on this site and any other abuse, mental/emotional health, Alcoholics Anonymous, Al Anon, Gamblers Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, BPD, Victims of Domestic Violence websites etc start learning about the true definition, the true nature of codependancy and itís causes and effects. I would recommend the first place to start is a site called www.joy2meu.com I donít think there is anybody else who has been able to gather all the information and demonstrate it verbally or in print as well as the man who created this site."
"Lovely website. Well written."
"This is the best book I have ever came across dealing with these issues... it feeds my soul. I can't think of a better description."
"Im 21yrs old from Sydney, Australia. Over the past months I have been uncovering and adventuring through the path of recovery. I have found your website the most insightful so far. When i started on my journey I found most of the information I found helpful to my cause but my not fulfilling to my overall understanding. I still had this internalised feeling of doubt and suspicion over my newly acquired perspective. Though, with all honesty the thoughts you put forward have filled that gap and inspire and motivate me on my path."
"Thank you for sharing some of your writing on your website. I haven't gone through the 12 steps but i was intererested in reading about your perspective on spirituality. For some reason it doesn't suprise me that even though i haven't been through the 12 steps, i have been "forced" to go through a similar transformation that you describe in powerlessness to empowerment."
"Thanks for the richness of your website. I almost could heal with just that."
"I can't tell you how lucky I feel to have happened upon your website. I have come to realize most recently that I have what they call "obsessive behavior". I am no expert of course, and as far as I know it only exists during, but mostly after, romantic relationships that I have been involved in, and as I was searching for information on line regarding this, I came across your website. . . .After reading a few of your articles I couldn't believe how much I connected with what you were saying, it's as if you were talking about me and my life, and although reading is wonderful and enlightening, I need more."
"Well i have to say thank you for your insightful web pages. . . these articles all ring true for me."
"I am enjoying your book greatly. . . I do not like to read that much but your book is quite interesting. The majority of the information makes complete sense. It is nice to know that I am not a screwed up hopeless cause. I feel empowered to make changes and do not feel guilty for seeking out help to be a happy, healthy person. I want to be a postitive role model for my children as well. I have spent far too much of my life being bitter and owning that bitterness as part of my identity. I did not want to forgive or let it go because I felt I would loose part of who I am. However, I was only preventing myself from giving and accepting love and joy. Thank you for your book."
"I just found your great website in my search for a CODA meeting."
"I guess I just want to say thank you for your site; it has helped me in so many ways. Most importantly, it clarifies all the work that I've been doing over the past 14 years...I'm finally understanding and forgiving. Again, thank you so very, very much!"
"All I can say is WOW! I Googled this morning and the first site I landed on was yours."
"Another relationship(really learning lesson) for me just ended. I had become sick of this. I know codependency well. I went back and reviewed my life and came up with variuos triggering incidents, had a list of issues, main two being that of "trying to prove to my mother that I was good enough," and to be complete I needed to be in a relationship. In fact all of my relationships followed these lines. I was not sure how to address these and begin the healing process. I found you on the internet. The rest is history, and your book arrived at the appropriate time.
I cannot put into words the enormity of help and comfort and potential for healing that your message brought to me. My list of issues was validated, and as I read the book, it was as if I was reading an autobiography. Many of your ideas, I have had and know them to be true, I lacked the confidence and trust in myself and love to know them as true. During the three days that I have been reading your message, there have been four triggering events that brought me to tears. Before I began to read, my eyeballs hurt, no headache just the pain of eye strain. With my emotional release, the eyeball pain is gone. All I know is that the God-force was preparing me to begin dealing with the couped up emotional pain. I know it is only the beginning, but I embrace the journey with a more appropriate attitude.
I will continue to process your message, and with God's help, grow stronger and help the universal evolutionary process. I will always be mindful of integration and balance. Thank you, and I truly appreciate the message that you brought to me at the proper time. Needless, to say I will be referring your book to anyone that will listen."
"well, if so, then hello robert. i just came across the website that featured your 'healing the child within' articles. i wanted to say that every single thing in them matches what i've been learning in counselling. i found it reassuring to read the articles as it was a reinforcement that someone else (besides my counsellor,) understands what i am going through.
i found your explanation of feeling the feelings and how you thought if you allowed yourself that right you'd end up crying in a rubber room for the rest of your life, quite accurate! in fact, almost every day i feel i am masochistic for allowing myself to "go there." i feel quite alone in the process, as most people around me simply self-medicate and must think i'm quite self-absorbed with all of this "healing" business. and the fact that no special alien can come down and heal me/there are no secret codes/pills/time limit resonated with me as well...i've often wondered if my soul had been plagued with some sort of grief a shamanistic healer could free me from. also, the harder i try to clean up my life (quit drinking, go to therapy, etc.) the WORST i seem to be...because the "pandora's box" is indeed open, and i am feeling for a change. it's no fun, huh?. . . . . ps: i can REALLY relate to those articles...the more i think about it, the more i can. the part about 'trust' just popped in my mind...it's so true---i'm always suspicious because i don't know who to trust because what we naturally felt as kids was told was wrong or inappropriate. GOD, what a waste of time all this regressing is haha."
(November 8, 2007)
"The Dancing in
the Light stuff is awesome! It hits me like a lazer beam. It is all
very profound. I am getting it. I finally understand totally about coming
from a place of woundedness. This path I am on is all very strange., I
am getting so many answers.. a lot of guidance. I am finally relying on
me instead of wanting someone else to do it for me. . . . the emotional
vampire info changed my relationship with my father. I just dont go there
anymore with him.. Man oh man.. I was really giving myself away to him.
And others too! I am excited about getting your book. This information
is priceless... I am so grateful you wrote it."
"We've listened and loved your CD version, and now want the book to go along with it. We are both very active AA members."
"Thanks for the book and cds, and especially for the personal dedication of the book, which you most likely write in every book you send, which is in my opinion utterly cool! :) I have devoured your website quite thoroughly in little over a year, that I've been on the strenuous but, oh, so rewarding path of recovery. It was now the time for me to buy the book from which it all started sprawling. I've read the material of the book in citations on the articles on your site several times, but I wanted now the full and original version of the book that has had such an impact on me and had created such shivering resonance in my Soul. The CDs are absolutely a mind-blowing audiospiritual experience! You rock, man!! It's one thing to read the articles on the clinically electric computerscreen and completely another level of involvement hearing the man himself utter his own words of wisdom and spiritual alchemy. One can tell that you aren't just mumbling through a book you've written; while listening it becomes certain that the message truly is your spiritual truth and not just some neatly packaged intellectual mindjob disguising itself in spiritual language. And for a work-in-progress production the quality of the audio is solid. I dig the vintage cassette feeling that has remained on the CD-version quite nicely. A slight indie/garage resonance enhances the street-cred-value of the recording it most certainly deserves. Cult stuff, indeed! ;)
An enormous THANK YOU for sharing your story and perspective for all the world to see, I truly appreciate it, man!"
"After reading your website it felt like I was drinking water after being in a desert for 30 years."
"My name is _____ and I have been following your work via your web site from almost the beginning and I have been tremendously impressed with it. Your work is more comprehensive than anyone I have seen in the recovery field ever. In fact it is almost overwhelming."
"These are some of the best articles I have ever read. Thank you for sharing your insight and experiences."
"A therapist recently suggested I look into inner child healing, so I was surfing around the internet today and came upon your site - Wow, what I read was nothing short of amazing. The painful and confusing thoughts I had been having really re-formed to make sense after reading some of your articles."
"I just found your web-site and have to say that you said in one page what I have been trying to articulate (to my self first and then to others) for years. THANK YOU for your work and the way that you express your truth. This is a great site and I am thankful I came across it. I look forward to spending some more time here and checking out your other writings as well. Thank you sincerely"
"I am greatly enjoying your work on the Joy 2 Me and U website. I have never seen such a wonderful collection of writings in one place. My feelings about life are very closely aligned with your work, and I am finding it invaluable. . . Thank you so much for your time and help, and thank you for your wonderful articles. I look forward to reading more of your work in the near future."
"Your website was a blessing. I cried as I read all the pages that I could within 7 days. I was obsessed with it. So I thank you."
"First of all thank you so much for your trust in your intuitive guidance it has lead you to put out information that will help many people. It has helped me thru a tough time recently and I am very greatful to you."
"I LOVE your tape !!!!!!!!!!! YOU ARE AMAZING~~~~YOUR VOICE IS AMAZING, YOUR MESSAGE IS AMAZING. I have a NEW problem~~I didn't want to go to SLEEP I wanted to stay up all night and just listen to the tape !!! And I turned it on first thing this morning and didn't want to LEAVE for work!!! What a problem~!~!
It is so amazing. The words just go right into my soul~~~~~~~~~ I am soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo happy. Thank you so much for sharing your recovery with all of us. This is the BEST gift I've had in a long time. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"I have been looking at these web pages and it has released so much anger and sadness in my body. thank you for sharing."
"I read many of your articles in internet. They are so clear and so right on to my mind and heart. Thanks for your works in this area."
"Thank you so very much!!!!! To start with I immediately felt special when you signed my copy of your book. . . . . It is not unusual for me to drive 200 to 400 miles a day. Needless-to-say, I listened to your 3 CD's in 2 days. What a wonderful experience!!!! I am HIGHLY suggesting to my 6 sponsees (we're in NA and I have 16 years clean)that we are going to have a "Celebrate Burney and Humaness" day free from shame and perfectly human!!! Your willingness to share your experience ,strenght, and hope are greatly appreciated............so, Thanks to you sir!!!!"
"Much of what you have written on your web site resonates deeply with me. I am from an alcoholic, emotionally abusive/neglectful home and much of what you have written describes my resulting codependent patterns."
"I've already healed a lot of issues from applying what you say on your website. I love your website so much and it has helped change my life. your book will be icing on the cake."
"I finished reading your book Dance of the Wounded Souls. I just wanted to write and thank you for your experience and your insight. It is a shame that we have to get beat up by the stream or beaten with the stick so many times before we learn an easier way isnít it? . . . Many blessings to you and I hope you know that if you had blinded me in a previous life, you have indeed repaid your Karmic debt."
"You have done some amazing work and I applaud you for the courage to share everything you have."
"I remember reading and enjoying your book years ago, though I don't believe I was ready for it at the time. I am now diving into recovery through 12-step and counseling (who knew I belonged here?!) and it is not an easy journey. I had forgotten about the book (misplaced it, loaned it out....) until just now when I came across your website again. Funny.....everything seems to be coming full-circle these days! . . Thank you for sharing your wisdom and healing energy."
"Hi Robert~ I just want you to know how much you/ your book has inspired me~ I beieve with all my heart that God brought me to your site and I have been truly blessed~ I thank you."
"My biggest problem in all my recovery/healing was forming the spiritual aspect... and I really relate and agree with your view on it. Especially how Paul really f-----d it up with our relationship with spirituality. I think I can finally get over the blame/shame that Catholicism embedded in me, and live happily, joyous and Free! I still go to my 2-3 very strong support groups/meetings a week, but I now have so much more to share, relate to and pass on."
"I received my book today and I am just dancing! You see about a year ago when I was dealing with repressed memories of childhood abuse I found your site. I always wanted to get your book but did not. The other day I was at a sweat lodge and great healing came about but it brought me back to your information. The book spoke to get it.
Little did I understand why but I opened to a section about touching and expressing love no matter what gender and I was just shouting from the roof tops. I have been working through this very issue. . . . . God I can not tell you how free it makes me feel to know I was not wrong for what I was feeling and desiring to express. It felt soooooooooo trapped as I was made to feel it was sooooooooo wrong. I am not talking about anything to violate the trust, repect or boundries of another but just freedom of touch in general. I have always been a touchy feely person and it has been hard at times Robert.
I look foward to reading you book all the way through. I am seriously thinking about starting a support group and if I do I would like to use your book with your permission of course. I noticed that I can order in bulk quantity. I cant express my gratitude to you Robert. Oh and Yes..........thank you sooooooooooooo much for taking the time to sign my book copy. YOU ARE THE BEST! HAVE A WONDERFUL VIBRANT RADIANT DAY MY DEAR BROTHER."
"Your website and book have helped me more than I can say. I love the way you write."
""The Dance of Wounded Souls" did change my life. Thank you."
"I wanted to tell you thank you for your website and all of the articles you writeÖI was searching for websites on codependence and stumbled upon your great works and now I read a ìchapterî a day. I canít tell you the INSPIRATION you have instilled in me to want to get to know my SELF better and own my SELF, and all that comes with it."
"Just want to say that I have been researching some of your work and for the first time ever I feel relaxed content and at peace despite my life being sheer hell at the Moment."
"I have truly enjoyed reading the articles on your website thus far. I am certain I will enjoy the book more. Thank you so much for the free information. I have just ended a very emotionally abusive relationship that ended in physical abuse and have been struggling for answers. Your articles were so refreshing that I instantly felt better after reading a couple of them."
"Thanks for sharing your ideas with those of us who can truly benefit from the knowledge you've assimilated."
"I borrowed your book from a friend and liked it so much that I wanted a copy for myself and my husband. We are therapists/life coaches and find your book a great resource for our clients. I will be referring many people to your book and website. We have been in Private Practice for 32 years and are always looking for good resources for our clients. Thanks for writing this great book."
"Hello Robert, I just finished listening to the tapes and I am so happy that I am able to send you a letter of thanks, and tell you how much I enjoyed every word. I laughed out loud many times and related on so many levels."
"I have found your book extremely insightful and want to buy one for my therapist."
"I just discovered your site and want to thank you for such wonderful information. What a gift you have provided! I've only just begun my journey on healing my inner children, and your site has given me the start that I so desparately needed. Thank You!"
"I simply want to say, "thank-you" for your site. I am a recovering codependent, and have been on the road to recovery since 2000.Your site contains the best information I've found on codependency and recovery."
"Recent circumstances in my life led me to your website, which absolutely resonates with me - more than any other self-help /break up /abandonment book I have read (too many to mention). Your philosophy fits perfectly with, and fully incorporates, my spiritual views. I have been looking for that for a long time. I hope to gain more insight from the book, and will definitely consider phone sessions and/or intensive training. I admire and appreciate your integrity in sharing what you have learned for a minimal price. Considering some of your past experiences, it would be understandable for you to want to profit as much as possible from your wisdom. You really must be working out a lot of karma."
"I found your website while looking up info on aca and codependence. I think the writing is profound and great and gave me more hope than anything I had read all week."
". . . it was not until I found your website that things really began to make sense and fall into place. I have been reading your material, I started with Loving the Wounded Child Within, it opened my eyes so wide and helped me finally to begin to see the truth, to see through the misperceptions that have were formed from my childhood, I now feel I can finally begin to let go of the past, the outdated, outmoded beliefs that have kept me attached to the past and kept me reliving it over and over again. Freedom is mine."
"Thank you for the wonderful site you have provided on the internet. I found it when I googled the word "discernment"."
"What I really like about the book though, is how I can seem to put things all together now. After lots of money spent on years of therapy (no resentment though, I had to go through it to be where I am), Landmark Forum (Twice!), and two years of the meetings, it feels so good to feel good about myself again and not so much of the negativity of the 12 step program. I was having a problem with the spiritual aspect and your writings follow right along with what I believe about the universe, etc. and I think it will really help me to live life freely again."
"thank you for the amazing gifts you bring to the planet and the healing that takes place on all levels."
"How brilliant are your words. I am a die hard born and bred skeptic and the comfort from your philosophy seems to touch all the areas I have chosen to embrace, to listen to. I have a feeling we may have had similar experiences. To be pushed by life to where I am today and to find your book is a blessing. It has helped my husband and myself to "SHUT UP!" and we were desperate for something to calm our fears something worth listening to. I think you hit the nail on the head. . . . . You have become my warrior of truth. A beacon of hope and happiness something I have lost so many years ago. The beauty of it all is after so many extreemly complicated issues comes such a simple cure and thats how I believe life should be, simple. I believe the most brilliant minds find their conclusion in simplicity, though you do have to be smart enough to realize when it appears. I think you are BRILLIANT! BRILLIANT! BRILLIANT!"
"Your site has been the most help in my quest to become healthy from Co-Dependence."
"I am just so very grateful that you had the courage to present your Truth in exactly the context in which you presented it. I am so grateful that you can acknowledge that this life business can feel like a cruel and pointless joke and still ask us to consider that maybe it does all make sense somehow and we are loved unconditionally. Thank you so much, Robert, for daring to burn brightly."
"thank you for your work and for your sharing, it is truly a life saver, please keep writing, i will be forever grateful that i found your website. but i think it was the universe guiding me towards you and towards better life emotionally."
"I have enjoyed your website so far, and I'm looking forward to your book. When I first read your site, I felt that I have finally found something that describes me and makes sense. Although it is a relief to find such familiarity, it is also overwhelming and frightening to think of all the work that may lie ahead. And although the literature feels so familiar, it is still all very new to me and I am sure that I am no where near where I have to be to grasp the recovery concept. Nonetheless, it is good to know people out there that are going through the same thing, and that I am not alone."
"Great stuff, very helpful. Thank you for your work of assisting people to heal and grow."
" I just wanted to take a moment to thank you so very much for this site. . . . . . Thank you so very much once again, I was sitting here miserable having come to the realization that it was time to move on and afraid of the missing her that will ensue. But I feel much more confident that my decision is what is best for both of us."
"Really getting a lot out of your articles on codependence and healing the inner child. Man, you positively hit the mark when it comes to understanding what it is I'm currently dealing with -- toxic love, wounded inner children etc. Just want to say thanks."
"Found your web site and it made excellent reading, and provided a very good insight to what is happening to my wife."
". . . you kindly wrote me a message saying that you wished the book helped me along my life journey - to be honest that was an under statement! Having read your book, been to a CoDA meeting and read some of Pia Mellodys books, its like I am waking up for the very first time. The shifts in my emotional world have been quite profound and I am grateful to life that it has bought me to you and to our forthcoming meeting."
"First of all I must thank you. No words can express the graditude I am feeling for you appearing in my life."
"Robert, I have to say your website and articles are invaluable information to anyone who is on the healing path.You put to words many of the things that were confusing to me. Like much of my own emotional pain and confusion and self hatred. You put to words my own childhood experiences which I could not name or put a finger on. I had done some reading and had tapes on inner child healing but it was not as extensive as your website. Looking for information. I started doing a websearch on what was mental and emotional abuse, and I happened upon your website and what you say about religion is right on, definitely toxic and shamebased. You help expose the crap we have been fed by society and toxic religion. And you put things into a saner perspective. I hope you don't listen to those who may criticize or attack your ideas and beliefs, you are right On. . . . Unfortunately we have very few religious leaders who have the honesty and integrity you do about things"
"I just wanted you to know that it makes me feel better knowing that I am not alone in this struggle. By the way, I loved your CD's."
"I just found your website, and the article that you wrote in reply to questions about Jesus and Mary Magdalene. (Jesus & Mary Magdalene - Jesus, sexuality, & the Bible) I want to commend you on your work, and your research. Your research goes hand in hand with my own, and it is rare that I find someone that sees things in the same ways that I do. I will be reading through your site even more, but I wanted to take a few minutes to send my regards. Excellent job!"
"Had to let you know how much I enjoyed reading your book. It is a thorough overview of the subtle, but life draining issues of Codependence and the wounded inner child - and connects all aspects with a rare, wise and visionary insight."
"thank you forever so much for that site for sharing for completely changing my life."
"Your texts are a great help for me in my self-work, and I thank you very much for them, especially for your integration of feeling therapy and spirituality. It has been a new perspective for me, one which I highly appreciate."
"I don't know how to thank you enough...Your website and your Co-Dependence book have been brought to me just in time ...more so because I happened to open a page of your online writing that began " I spent most of my life wanting to die"...and that caught me because I was feeling that feeling again.
It is the first time that my life-experience, which felt so unlike anyone else's around me, has felt recognized, validated, empathized- word for word, sentence for sentence although the details of the circumstances are different, and this in itself is a big relief. . . . . I live in India. . . . . Thank you for having the courage to write the book and the online stuff. I hope there will be an opportunity to meet you someday. I hope I will be able to help others someday too."
"I received the book yesterday and am diving right in. I have enjoyed the website and your approach to codependence as a spiritual and cultural issue rather than just a " personality problem" that occurs in some individuals."
"I just finished reading your book. Without sounding like a converted cult member, I must say that those words more than resonated with me, they showed me how several puzzle pieces that I have acquired in my lifetime fit together. Thank you for writing it and sharing it with the world."
"Remember" is a great way of explaining the feeling you get when you are being enlightened. I have often used that word myself, because at those "Aha" moments, even though I feel like light is being shed on something that I had not noticed before, there is always a feeling that I already, in fact always, knew the thing the light was revealing. I also use "resonate" to describe it, because it feels like something deep down inside recognizes it's long-lost twin. . . In any case, this is how I felt when I was reading your book, and I am on-board with everything you are saying."
"Your words offer a compassionate clarity to cut through the emotional fog of accumulated hurts and wounding in our lives."
"I had looked up tough love and came upon your website -I just downloaded huge amounts of your website that I will read this weekend. I am the codependent mother of a 21 year old son who I have allowed to turn my life inside out over the past 5 years. . . . Bless you for putting this website together."
"I find your work revolutionary, and I dont say it to please your ego, but becouse I realy think so."
"Your insight is a breath of fresh air for me.. . . . .Just letting you know I am reading and reading and re-reading and actually have made a notebook to journal the steps. I am not in a hurry, it has already been 48 yrs. of this. I want to get it right this time and if I drop dead 10 minutes after feeling that personal victory of owning self-love...I will still say the journey was all worth it. Thank you for all you have shared with the "online world" out here."
" I am reading a lot of the stuff from your site - very good.... very helpful to me personally outside the office and also in the office."
"I must say that I read literally hundreds of books, self help, healing, spiritual etc and have never before felt compelled to write to the author until now. . . . This morning I chose to read passages of your book again to see if it might get me through the day and I have to say you have touched me to my soul with the Truth that I have felt in your words. I cry as I type this. I love your "fucking asshole" to your Higher Power. I must say that I have certainly felt this way about mine lately as well. You have given me hope that this might all really be part of the perfect plan and I wanted to thank you for that today. . . . Again thank you for your book ... and for getting me through my day!!"
"My name is ______. I found your site and it is changing my life. Thank you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! . . . . I am so thankful for finding this information at this time in my life."
"Your book is a big part of my progress in dealing with my own stuff. For the most part, my friends are recovering non-drinking alcoholics, and without noticing the transformation, I somehow started avoiding the drinking ones. From the first time I visited your website I felt like I was talking with an old friend."
"Thank you so much for all the information. I am revisiting your site after some years for 'the crappeth has hitteth the faneth' big time in my life and I need to ground."
"I would like to thank you for creating your amazing website...I am 25 student of counselling, who recently finished her another tragic codependent relationship:/....I have done plenty of work around my self esteem, childhood trauma, and irrational beliefs to change my attitiude and choices in life. I am not saying it did not help me, but I did not felt truly understood and in spite of all, still kept my inner children rulling. Few days ago I was really desperated, I lost faith that anything will change. I observed all my life's fascinations and they all perfectly fitted to 'UNhappy ever after' story. I started to believe that this is how I was and there was not much to do about it, when I accidently googled your website I spent 2 whole days reading your texts. I also bought 'Codependence: The Dance Of Wounded Souls' straightaway. I was laughing and crying sometimes in the same time. At last, someone who understand me, even more, who experienced exactly the same situations, feelings...and found the way out of this. There is hope. There is strenght. Knowing that it is possible to stop to crave for critical and unavaible partners gives me that power. And me, I am sitting on the table with all my children around me Lonely child, the one with broken spirit, bad little kid.... romantic and magical thinking ones are here as well but more distant, still angry at me since I told them that Fairy Tales are not true. But I know they will be ok!, I will be ok!...universe showed me that he cares by giving me your book to put these pieces together and make more sense from my living:) THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THAT Mr. Burney:)"
"Hi Robert, Iíve read a lot on your site and Iím very interested in what you teach and the way you explain problems."
"_____ was kind enough to share your article with me. I've read a portion of it tonight and am excited that there may be a light at the end of the proverbial tunnel. I'm starting to understand how I got where I am and how to get where I need to go."
"I am experiencing a romantic break up after 9 years and your knowledge is here now to help me understand and heal and move forward. I have come to an understanding of myself that I have searched for since I was 17 (I am now 45). I do believe this is not a coincidence and am thankful to be coming into these levels of understanding after so long. Thank you for so generously sharing!"
"WOW!! I mean, WOW!!!! I see an email from you and I canít believe my eyes. I told my husband last week; there is one person Iíd like to meet before I die, and that is Robert Burney. You have no idea the impact youíve had in my recovery since I first heard you last year. My husband had your tapes sitting in his office for a few years and one day I noticed them. As you say, there are no accidents, no coincidences. It was a time in my recovery where I had thrown away my Catholic God as well as all spiritual hope and all I could think of was, how much longer before I get a chance to check out. Dealing with people, hurting those I loved, being hurt, afraid of confrontation, angry, etc... that was my dilemma.
Youíve given me hope and a door into a program that fits. I have been a member of Al-anon for years but, though it helped, it just wasnít cutting it. Then I heard you and I realized, I am a full blown adult child. And yes, there is a God that loves me, warts and all. My soul is coming out more and more and I kind of like her. So with my deepest gratitude and admiration I thank you for all your wisdom and sharing. I am so looking forward to meeting you!!!"
"I actually already own a copy. (of Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls) It has been so helful and insightful in my own journey out of codependence that I am giving a copy to my mother:) and to my best friend. This is the second book that I have read on this and while I learned a lot about the disease in the first book, yours has touched me on a much deeper level. Thank you for that.
"I've been a huge fan of your web page joy2meu for years. I'm a coach who uses inner child-based techniques in conjunction with other tools both in my own life and with clients."
"I am very much inspired by your work and would like you to know that I'm very much touched by your life history and i can very much relate to it. . . . . I thank you very much and would like to read your articles more often. I think this will help me get some clarity and understanding about the person I am and finding peace within my inner soul. Thank you so very much for your writings."
"Thank you for a truly amazing book! In fact, some of the sample / examples of the mother and father you shared left me thinking, "well d*mn, how does he know MY family!?!" . . . . My thank you headed into a lengthy narrative, so i decided it best to abbreviate it all by saying - you work has left a lasting impression on me and echoes the voice I have heard calling me for years!" (the same person wrote later "I jumped too soon when writing, as I had not completed the Cosmic perspective. if you only knew how it meshed so coherently with the kabalah coursework I received.)"
"I do not know how I found your webÖprobably it was meant to beÖ. Thank you for U being who U were and is. There are so many things I have experienced exactly in the way U had, it seems to me that YOU is almost me."
"Just wanted to thank you for your web site. I have been away from the Inner Child/Co-dependent work for quite a while and it was good to be brought back to this very important inner work. For those of us that are not in a position to purchase books, the web site offers great free material which can only benefit us. . . . As a woman, I appreciate your understanding of our centuries old wounds and how we pass those wounds on to other people. It is the main reason I decided not to have children. I also appreciate your take on what happens to girls as they turn into women and how our fathers turn away from us and turn on us and do not celebrate our transition - very sad (refers to article Wounded Parents - the tragic legacy of dysfunctional families). . . . Anyway, thanks again for your web site."
(May 20, 2007)
"I read The Dance of the Wounded Souls and I
think it will be life changing for me."
"I ordered your book a few weeks ago . . . . . it has changed my life. I went from hating to go to AA to going at least once a day. I went twice today. I have ordered another book for my son ____ who is in rehab. I hope it helps him as much as it helped me."
"I just want to thank you for your wonderful website and thank you for keeping it accessible to all. I've been coming back to it every so often over the years. It is like a sacred place where I can come and be understood and helped. I don't know if you get compliments like this often. I just wanted to make sure you know just important the work you do is."
"Robert, thank you, your website is amazing, such great info. Congratulations on your great work..."
"I had received your book in the mail on Friday and i have not been able to put it down since. very well written and indeed gives a lot to think about and a much healthier perspective of life. I have been in therapy for years as a result of a terrible childhood and i have that problem you had mentioned of the critical parental voice that makes me think im an evil monster when infact i havent done anything wrong and never meant harm to anyone. it can get overwhelming sometimes but your book seems to point me in the right direction."
"I found your website and LOVE it! really resonates :)"
"I read your book, I have to admit it is good and that is saying a lot, because I am sick and tired of these self-help books and allergic to spiritual mumbo jumbo, but you have something."
"As an transactional analyst I find the information on your website very relevant to my work. Also, coming from a dysfunctional family, repeating my own dysfunctional patterns with my children, I am now in the grieving stages of the break-up of an emotional abusive relationship. Not only did he broke my heart but my soul was complety destroyed in the process and I lost all passion for life. I now have the courage to move forward and would like to attend one of your inner-child workshops. Congratulations on an excellent website."
"I have gone to your site over and over again and am reading and taking it all in.... thank you for this wonderful site."
"Thank you so much for your literature. thank you for your time you spent in giving it. Thank you for your courage to share your experiences."
"Robert, I am surprised that people who visit your website don't buy your book or ebook. Your website and writings represent to me the only kind of real, grounded (Amerincan) spiritual and psychological information I have read on the internet so far. I used to have lots of information on my websites for free and many visitors from all over the world, but I decided that I needed to have some balance in all this, so I made an ebook instead and only had a few writings on my website for free. Maybe an idea for you too? Of course people like what they can get for free, but your information is valuable information which comes from the heart (I feel). So many people write about spiritual stuff but contrary to your writings, it seems that the experience from the human point of view of having been through all that they write about is missing, and this is certainly not what I feel from reading your website. So keep up the good work."
"I would like to be put on your email list for any emailings you send out and info on your work. I am finding what I have read to be of great interest and better said and more clearly stated than anything else I have read or any of the work that I have done in therapy"
"Excited to receive your book! Thank you for responding so quickly to my enthusiastic e-mail :) I passed on some information from your site to friends and got responses immediately! One friend in San Diego, _____, said he is going to take the first workshop coming up this month (i think that's pretty soon). And another friend in Canada felt like it was speaking to her directly. So happy. I love sharing information that is full of divine truth and healing and much, much needed."
"I have learned so much from your articles . . . Your articles have helped me tremendously, and I thank you for them. I look forward to your book. . . you have definitely hit the mark for me, and I value your insight. I thank Spirit for leading me to your website."
"I found your website through a yahoo search on emotional grieving. Thanks for your time in developing and sharing your website."
"I spent the morning reading your newsletter and I especially liked the thought of the childhood healing seminars that you have created . There can be much accomplished through this type of healing . Far too many of our everyday problems now stem from such experiences . Sometimes just saying them out loud can help a great deal at facing these demons down . Keep up the good work."
"I am very happy to be on your mailing list because everything I've read so far makes so much sense to me now that I'm off the drugs and I can only thank you for being there when I needed some help, and help so often comes from the most unexpected direction, thank you again."
"I am one of your Danish visitors. I find your information and articles brilliant and very useful. I have been very inspired when reading your writings. You seem to be a true lightworker to me. Thank you for doing such excellent work."
"I have just found your website and it is "right on time". I have struggled throughout my life with many of the feelings you discuss. Having no boundaries and codependency are the two major current items I have come to realize I must work on and I had very little information. Thanks for the information and I will be reading some daily."
"I received your book and really love it! It's like a deep sigh of relief from my inner child and soul as I read"
"Thank you so much for everything you have done for so many of us who need your words of wisdom. I read your book and have been continuing to read the information on your site. Because of this help, I feel like a weight has been lifted from me - I feel free, and able to smile - I do not feel empty and dead inside. I will continue to read everything I can on your site...It is transforming! Of course, I have to do the work but because of you and your site, I have the tools to work with."
"I wanted to thank you again for your web site. I spent a lot of years growing up feeling like there was something weird about me. I have a certain degree of ESP and I've always had vague memories of what felt like times and places I'd lived before. I never have talked about it much because it's offputting being able to know things like that when most people can't.
Two years ago, I started dating my current boyfriend. Over the course of that time, we wound up talking about a number of things (of course). About two months ago, he started talking about past lives, and we'd never talked about that before. He knows who he was in at least two past lives. I don't know who I was; I just know where I was. I didn't know before that there were other people like me. So, please put up with a "newbie" who has finally found out that there are other people like me and just wants to learn more about it."
"Thank you so very much for your website."
"I write to you in the month of my 3rd AA birthday, a 32 yr old single mum, in the process of integration of my fragmented modes with my wonderful therapist, stepping out to observe just how I play out Rescuer, victim, Perpetrator and back to university studying Theology, then likely a graduate diploma in Psychotherapy... I've defined myself from where I am now in my journey - where I found your pages on the net, and where I come back to for connection to tell my little girl that it is going to be OK and I am not going to die... You seem to write how I think (though I wonder if this is the same energy as when I sit in a meeting and feel like it was planned just for my ears only (I am sure you know how that feels!)) . ."
"I read a book on dysfunctional families I had had for a long time but hadn't opened, and happened to find your site on the internet. I am so amazed by all the discoveries this has brought to me. I was a good psychiatric nurse for many years but did not have any dealings with family therapy. Thank you for your site, it has been a revelation, and I hope will help to bring more peace to my life and my mothers. At last I understand."
"Just wanted to say thanks for the site. It was very helpful reading your narratives about each of the family roles as I study for my "Substance Abuse and Social Work Practice" class. . . . Keep going! Your life story was very inspiring, and is one more testament to the importance of dreams and perseverance."
"Dear Mr. Burney, I ordered your book -in spite of what I considered was its somewhat-new-agy title- ;-) while browsing through Amazon.com for items on recovery. I received it yesterday, and thought I'd read a few pages before retiring for the night. Well, it's well past 11am, and I have not slept a wink! I do not believe I ever read anything so easily absorbable while being so profoundly enlightening. I remember the Bradshaw series, still have the tapes somewhere, read tons of material on self-healing etc including Dyer, Mindell, Gawain, and many others, but your book was by far the best "bull's-eye hitter" ever. I cannot express enough my joy and gratitude to you for creating this extraordinary spiritual revolution tool.
On another note, I got so excited about sharing your brilliant ìperspectiveî that I thought Iëd ask if you might consider authorizing me to do a French AND Arabic translation of the book! "
"I really enjoy your writings. I am reading about The New Age Misinterpretations. I too have come across people who talk about twin souls and say they channel things, but at the same time they are totally disconnected from their feelings and wounds. And I get this feeling they are striving for perfection and the light, but fail to understand that you cannot receive the light if you are disconnected from an emotional part of your own being. I think this split happened at the time of Atlantis where feelings were considered to be bad."
"Absolute Masterpiece! I have finally finished my first reading of the book. I do love to read but I took my time to read it all. Now I understand why it is not a best seller. You would put too many people and the powers that be out of commission. Imagine one book having the power to do all that. It is funny when I started to think what I was going to write in response to the book, I likened you to the messiah...and lo and behold you started writing about it on page 111...so I said oops, it wouldn't seem like my words now would they? That continued to the end, my thoughts eventually I started to read in the pages that followed, it was amazing! Never before have I ever read a book so thoroughly explaining all my suffering etc. . . . I do love the incorporation of Native American spirituality...I always felt that the Native American holocaust preceded ours...if they weren't successful in taking over this land...we would never have been stolen to be slaves. . . I honestly feel the book was written for me and it was my time to find it. . . ...you are just here ahead of your time...and for that I am eternally grateful because it is my time. Thank-you.
"Your website is such a deep allowing life-affirming place. Thank you so much for what you've shared in your website. . . . . I felt led to email you and thank you. We are strangers and yet not. The way you write and explain your work is very familiar to me at some deep inner level. I want to thank you for what you share in your website. I am not in a place in my life where I can attend workshops right now. If I could I would so sign up for yours! Thank you!"
"I have been reading your excellent pages on 'Setting Boundaries'. They have helped me a lot."(refering to Setting Personal Boundaries - protecting self)
"I just found your site on Google. Great site... keep up the great work! =)"
"What a feeling, What a rush - to be present in the here and now. I have been reading your articles off and on for about two years. . . . all my relationships were acutely dysfunctional until I found AA, then AlAnon and then ACOA. The latter being the one that was home to me. And it took 10 years of this (and therapy) to begin to change my life. Armed with an education in 12 step programs I made a choice to try to become healthier ie. couldn't take the pain any longer. Of course my family have not been receptive and in fact express anger for the changes they see/feel in me. To continue, I found your webpage about two years ago. . . I work on healing myself daily and have spent more time in the here and now/the present in the past year than at any other time in my life and a major support is being able to access your webpage - reading - feeling - affirmations - all part of my daily life. I am also writing my dissertation and that is more than a fulltime job. . . it was time to thank the person who has given me encouragment to go on. For me, reading your articles has been as if I were in a therepeutic relationship with you and I have gained so much - even a little serenity."
"I have just finished reading 'The Dance of Wounded Souls', and i particularly enjoyed the last chapter. It gave me an insight and answered some of my questions. Without coming across your web sights I would not of totally understood about the disease of co-dependance and i didnt realise it went that deep."
"I have been reading your pages on codependency and recovery with great interest. Thank you for making that material available. I've been in AA for a while, and your synthesis of 12-Step spiritual principles with codependency healing make more sense to me than Melody Beattie's sometimes candy-coated approach. Thanks again for your insight and willingness to help through clear explanation."
"I feel I grew a lot by reading your book, and what you taught me is wonderful and beautiful knowledge. I feel how special my inner child is lovable and loving. Wow Robert your awesome teacher, I hope to meet you someday, that is my hope my friend, I thank my creator and I thank you Robert, isnít joyful to see and hear the creation of our holy mother source the nature, what I see I love and what I hear I love."
"Hi Robert~ I love your work, and have recommended it to others who are serious about their spiritual path."
"Over many years I have found help and solace from your writings. Thank You!"
"Maybe it's a coincidence or not, but I ordered your tapes many years ago while attempting to do something about my situation and I really liked what I heard but it was all lost and fore-gotten over the course of going through a divorce and attempting to recover from that. So here I am probably 7 or 8 years later and after witnessing some close friends go through loss of loved ones and my own father with a blood disease and a shortened life expectancy, I found myself searching the net for some help, some guidance and direction, and have stumbled once again into you. I have spent hrs and hrs searching and reading and I like the approach that you have."
"Hi, I've really identified and enjoyedthe material on this websit"
" It will be quite fine to add me to your e-mail list, your website is very impressive, though i cried immensely after reading it."
"Hello, I had been co dependent and an enabler for years. In the past year I have taken ownership of myself and have confronted years of dysfunction. With that, there is another person involved and your site has helped me confirm and has given be the hope to go deeper, to put the dysfunction to death forever. Thank you"
"Robert, thank u very much for all the information provided on your website, i just ordered a copy of your book and am awaiting it's arrival with as much patients as possible. i have read just about everything and the words on your page resonate very strongly."
"I read and re-read your articles on your website for help and hope for me. I fit into exactly what you write about."
"Thank you for your excellent work and insight!!! Hi Robert my name is _______ and I just wanted to say thank you very much for allowing us to read your thoughts regarding basic self awareness. I am sure we have only scratched the surface however, it would appear that on some levels humanity is slowly but surely moving in a positive direction. Telling the truth to ourselves is extremely difficult and taking action is even more so and this is why I found your work so very important in our ever changing dysfunctional world. At the end of the day our "errors" are only half the battle. The other half is what we do to make things better. . . . Your work helps illustrate all of the basic themes in human behaviour with only the names and faces that change. Thank you very much for providing us with the tools so that if and when, we choose to enlighten ourselves and others the opportunity is there. Let's make the world a better place by losing the secrets and enjoying the healing process. Thanks again and keep up the good work. "
"I have found your book to be very insightful and I am attempting to apply some of the principles."
"just found your material on the internet following a argument with my Mom! I happened to type in on a yahoo search engine for some help this morning and came across your article titled "Emotional Honesty and Emotional Responsibility" and it literally is beginning to unmask things that I never had words for in my relationship with my Mom! Thanks ahead of time for all your writing is and will do/doing for me and my relationships with God, self, and others! I can feel such hope and anticipation on what lies ahead for me in this next season of growth!"
"I identified, myself, tremendously with the information on your web site. Thank you. GREAT WORK!"
"I came across your website when I was searching for information about 'emotional boundaries' ... and I was so impressed by the articles you'd written and the information on your website that I wanted to read the books you've written about issues that I think hit very close to home for me (I included the CD's because I want to put them on my Ipod so I can listen on the train to London and back for work). What you wrote really resonated with me so I'm looking forward to receiving the books and CDs and to learning more -- about boundaries and about myself ... : ))) ... Based on a very small sample -- of one, me -- I know that generalizing is dangerous (yes, you guessed it, I'm an academic, American, but displaced to the UK) ... Nevertheless, I think you've got a really powerful website and are probably helping more people than you realise come to terms with the 'baggage' we've dragged with us into adult-hood from the time we were small ... Already, I've learned an enormous amount ... and I feel so encouraged ... Anyway! Thanks again ... "
"I do hope this is the right address to get in touch with you directly. I have been meaning to get in touch with you for some time as I wanted to say I have been deeply moved by your writing (both your book, The dance of Wounded Souls as well as your web pages) and feel convinced that what lies between me and my healing is the need to heal my inner child."
"If I could afford it, I would send this book to every person who needed it, which is most everyone! I'm very glad there are brilliant people such as yourself that have the capacity to help in this world. Thank you so much, Robert"
"I just ran across your web-site while doing a google search for codependcy + alcoholism and it directed me to your "Toxic Love" link which was really what I needed to see. There were parts that rang so true that I literally gasped out loud. It made me want to go and wake my husband with a hug because we are both stuck in the same vicious cycle together and (thankfully) finally trying to figure out where to begin the recovery. My next hour was spent reading about the Inner Child and I have forwarded the web site address to my sisters as well. I think they will find it as beneficial as I am. Please add me to your e-mail newsletter - I plan to visit your site often and would love to hear more of what you have to say. Thank you for your time and your work!"
"Thank you for writing this book. I have been handed many publications on codependence and adult children, and this is the only one that has given me hope and inspiration."
"I am enjoying your book, and I appreciate your down-to-earth, no-nonsense approach."
"I was so grateful to find your site while I was searching for help in getting thru my "4th Step" in my program where I am healing from many years of emotional, sexual and physical abuse and codependence. This step has been very very taxing for me. Most of my trauma has been blocked out so I have had a real struggle to "dig up the bones". I believe the LORD led me to your page where I saw your book. It looked like EXACTLY what I needed to begin my healing process. I didnt hesitate to order it. Thank You for writing it. Its exactly what I need."
"Just like to tell you that i think your insight and word display are simply amaizing, just so everything that i believe and feel are so integeral to us as humans. You conceptualise, intelectualise and emotionalise everything so well. You are really a great spirit. I would love to come to one of your seminars one day! You have a little admirer down under."
"I am so inspired by the readings on your site that I just ordered your book: "Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls". . . . I just wanted to write and say thank you for sharing your emotions. You definitely give me hope"
"I do not know if you ever get a change to read your e-mail, but would really just like to thank you for your work that you made so freely available on the internet. I am sure it is a lifesaver to many people and has been an answer to my cry for help. Not having any one to talk to and not knowing how to bother people with my problems without creating more for myself and others, and when every one so firmly believes I donít have any, I ask God to give me an answer through google. To get an answer to my continuous self-inflicted emotional pain I wanted to know why I am so ëemotionally needyí and how to heal this deep empty hole inside of me. Your web pages came up addressing a lot of my problems. I am stil far from where I want to be, but as you said life is a process. . . .Thank you very much again for sharing your insights, knowledge and experiences and your time."
"Your web site inspired me! . . . . I loved your web site, loved where you're coming from."
"Your writings and website continue to be a tremendous help and inspiration to me. I can particularly relate to your ideas on "counterdependence". I certainly have and do swing between the poles of codependence and counterdependence often. I find that counterdependence in particular leads me to a harsh rigidity and narrow-mindedness that is not a good place to be. The difficulty is that the outward manifestations of counterdepndence (setting boundaries, not being a victim, etc.) can actually appear healthy on the surface. It's only when I look at how I'm getting there that I realize that it's really no closer to a healthy love and trust of self than codependence."
"A week or so ago you sent me a copy of your book, Codependence: The Dance of Wounded Souls. I was deeply touched by the personal message you'd handwritten inside, wishing me well on my spiritual path, and my first thank you is for that. It gave me an immediate sense of connection with you.
My second thank you is for your book itself. I've never believed in the "no coincidences" philosphy of life, but the way your words have resonated with me is making me question my own (dis)beliefs. Your words have given me an unexpected shift in perspective. I've always thought myself to be spiritual in a sort of abstract and "intellectual" (read: totally disconnected!) way. Now suddenly, for the first time in my life, I feel like my spirituality is taking flight. Or at least, my awareness of it is. I'm feeling like there might be hope for my life.
You wrote that "our personal stick" (mine being an addiction to a relationship) "is the blessed gift that has started our awakening to consciousness of our path". I can't tell you how much that idea alone is helping me right now. I've been in a process of emotional healing for about 8 years now, making great strides, but without making much progress on my "personal stick". Your words have opened up for me the possibility that there is a very good reason for that.
I've just purchased a package of telephone sessions with you. I am very much looking forward to beginning this work, this adventure. But with this email I just wanted to thank you for what you have already given me."
"Robert! Just a note to say, WOW! Is this not just the most incredible and awesome journey on which you find yourself? I just finished reading the following passage:
"The Universe completely ambushed me with this relationship - and did it in such a way, that I had to throw out all the romantic fantasy stuff. There was no feeling that I had met a soul mate or twin soul - or that there was some powerful vibrational or Karmic connection in this relationship. I don't even think in those terms any more.I bow my head in humility and reverence at the depth of the courage and the honesty this passage reveals and at the very real cost in pain and grief of such clarity and insight. At the same time, Robert, I am filled with such joy at this level of growth and awakening. There is a line in a poem by Walt Whitman that goes something like: "We but level that lift/To rise and go beyond. . ."I think that I am seeing now, that part of the experience I needed to surrender to, was to learn how to be present in reality in a romantic, intimate relationship. I mean, I knew that theoretically, but I don't think I have been focusing enough attention on actually doing it - actually being present and conscious of the gift that this relationship is in my life, the gifts this relationship has brought into my life.
I have been not been focusing on the relationship - or on my recovery. The fact that I haven't been focusing a lot of attention on my recovery - haven't thought I had the time and energy to do that - is definitely a strong contributing factor in what has been happening."
I am so happy about this gift of relationship in your life and all of its gifts to you. But when you can say, as you have in this passage, "I have not been focusing on the relationship - or on my recovery," I could leap in the air with the sense of liberation from lies that I am not doing recovery right. This is Truth which Lives and Breathes, not some canned, stale sales pitch. I can celebrate with you the amazing gifts and growth of the path you tread right now and feel a newfound measure of peace on my own path. Dance wherever you may be, Robert, at the Wonder of this Life!" (This is in reference to an addendum to the March 2007 Update: My Fear of Intimacy processing page)
"THE TIMES THAT I HAVE CARESSED MY SOUL WITH YOUR WORK, I HAVE GOTTEN INMENSE CLEARING - VERY MUCH IN CONTRAST WITH A FEW ATTENDANCES TO GROUPS AND READING OTHER WORK RELATED TO CODEPENDENCY. LOVEYOURWORK"
(February 28, 2007)
"Your website is helpful and encouraging, and it's so good to know
that someone else is approaching codependency recovery spiritually."
"In the 34 years of my sobriety, 30 of which has been working with addicts and families I have never read or heard anything that equals your writings on addiction and effects on loved ones. Thank you. "
"I just finished reading your book, The Dance of the Wounded Souls, and wanted to let you know how important a read it has been for me, walking the path I am now on. Many, many things clicked as I read. Many "aha!" moments. Understanding the different voices and emotions I'm finding is an indispensible key to this. I never thought in terms of different aged children coexisting in me, and never saw myself as an emotional six-year-old. But I sure do now! An incredible learning experience. . . Thanks again for sharing your profound insights. They are helping to light my path."
"I read the Dance of Wounded Souls just before Christmas and it has been very helpful. It is helping me to work through and understand problems that I have had with my partner and with my close friends. I think that many of my friends are wounded souls, as was/am I. I had an insight before reading it that we were friends because of some dysfunctional reason as well as because we have fun together.
It is a wonderful book. And it has helped me on a path to spiritual understanding and healing. I went to Southern India over Christmas and the New Year. And this also has opened my eyes to a different way of looking at the world. The people I met were wonderful. I really felt as if there was warmth and love between them and I. I really believe that you are right - once we start being conscious of the problems, we can then start to change."
"Thank you for your response. I listen to your CD's every morning and evening, as I take the NYC subways to and from work. It is helping to change my life immensely. God bless you for putting out this beautiful, so desperately-needed work"
"Just wanted to say how thankful I am for you and your site and your wisdom! I'm at a real low point right now and I'm trying really hard to read and understand your articles. I can't afford a therapist and so I'm so grateful."
"I was doing some searching and came across your website. I enjoyed your insight on many topics. Obviously I can relate... I plan on reading more of your experience and helpful suggestions."
"Dont know if you read these, But just in, case, would like to say thanks for your articles and how much they have helped me through recent crisis. You are an inspirational person. I asked for guidance and I got it. Thanks again This book is for my partner for Xmas. Hope he sees the light too."
"I had to stop today and take a moment to thank you for sharing your insight and knowledge with the world on your website. I began my healing a few years back and I still find that I put it on hold sometimes as it is very hurtful and probably the hardest job ever. I find your material inspirational and refer to it often. Esp. at work when I can take a break and read a bit to refresh my self. Working with family is hard enough but putting 2 stereotypical narcissists in the picture makes it brutal torture. My goals this year include a change of employment and more growth for my inner child and self. Thank you again for reaching out to others, you are an amazing man!!"
"I forgot to thank you for your Dance of the Wounded Souls book, I went through a major depression last year, and read it, it helped immensely and is one of a kind and ahead of its time! Your work is amazing, and I look forward to reading more that you publish. I am going on to study energy medicine and acupuncture and plan on understanding emotional intelligence/awareness and how false belief systems affect and manifest actual physical symptoms in our bodies, and would love to share your material with my patients who could benefit from your work!"
"I am so pleased to have have found your web site and pages and book. They are helping me NO END. I am not a recovering alcoholic, but an adult + child of one, and are recovering from my childhood abuse wounds which I finally SEE. I see how they have run my life thanks to your willingness to share your journey. I am in the process of RECLAIMING myself and existing for ME for the first time. it is very liberating. It is very HARD. But I feel the love finally. I am ready to receive it, knowing I have a right to exist, a right to breathe, a right to be here. THANKYOU. from my heart and soul."
"I have read your book "the dance of wounded souls" and it ressonated with me - the wounded child that I feel I carry around and the spiritual aspect - which I think is really my only hope."
"I would like to say Thank you for your wonderful website. I found it quite awhile ago and have been skirting around my codependency issues for some time. I plan to order the book soon. I have been quoting some of your writings on my blog."
"Thank you very much for the prompt delivery (and the enclosed inscription) of your book. I read it through the day I recieved it and found it to be powerfully insightful. Having this book enter my life at this point in my journey has helped greatly with some added perspective."
"I have found a deep connection with the way you have describe the circumstances of co-dependancy and how all pervasive it is - i have only came to the realisation before Christmas that my wounding had been since birth due to my parents own wounding etc. I have repeated the same issues again and again in my relationships ie different people but the same dynamics! I have found that there is a great deal of ignorance in the recovery groups